dEfEcTiVe
by ZiMagateophobia
Summary: ?
1. Tall Explosions, Evil Atmospheres

_Defective_

CHAPTER 1

_The deafening vibrations from the explosions outside rattled our shelter, the others lacking limbs and losing a profuse amount of blood from their gashes.. One's eye was completely torn from its socket. _

_The horrible stench of decaying bodies surrounded us, the bodies consisting of those who were obviously too weak to survive their wounds._

"_We will have to risk some of our soldiers as we make this grand escape. Skoodge! You will lead Tenn and the rest of you to safety, while WE take another route. They cannot catch all of us."_

"_Right," Skoodge nodded his head, the Irkens automatically agreeing with the leaders._

"_Wait! Does that really make any sense?! The Resisty has perhaps thousands of ships ravaging our planet at this very moment. To leave this shelter NOW means death for ALL of us. And taking in to consideration that you two are the most important, you need to stay alive until this invasion is over!"_

_The Tallests stared, their expressions blank, almost dumbfounded as to what I had explained. _

"_We won't be killed. Our leaders said so! Come on, Zim!"_

I tightly clenched onto the lifeless robot, shutting my eyes as the ship caught on fire, the alarms red and evident.

"_SKOODGE, YOU IDIOT!" I screamed as the fellow invader was completely reduced to nothing but dust as a laser blasted him away. _

_The invaders all panicked and escaped while they could, every last one of them sharing Skoodge's fate. _

_I whipped around to growl at the two leaders, pulling at my antennae in frustration. "HOW COULD YOU EVEN ORDER US TO SACRIFICE OURSELVES LIKE THAT?! JUST WHAT KIND OF TALLESTS ARE YOU?!"_

"_YOUR Tallests! Now, GET OUT THERE."_

_My eyes burned as I pointed my laser their way, lowering my voice. "__**You**__ get out there.."_

* * *

He watched the sky, the headphones blocking out his surrounding world.

All he could do was stare, each and every star seeming to shake from his strained vision.

He eventually had to blink and rub his eyes from the tears that formed after so long, sitting up and practically flinging the headphones.

"Just once.. Just for once!" he spoke to himself, wrapping his arms around his legs with his knees to his chest.

He could not help but look up again, blinking up at the slim moon, then at the constellations he could pinpoint.

This kept him occupied for the most part, until he had to shout in surprise from a loud bang from above, covering his ears.

And THAT is when he saw it.

Something apparently on fire, that is.. and descending rather quickly.

He stared in awe as the object came crashing down in a spiral, a trail of smoke following.

"DAD! GAZ! AN ALIEN SPACESHIP JUST FELL FROM THE SKY, I SAW IT!" He tumbled off of the roof clumsily, shaking his head and picking himself up off of the ground, running in.

* * *

I opened an eye, immediately gasping and sitting up, a little too swiftly for my head to handle.

I groaned, holding my forehead in my hands as I felt my surroundings spin and distort, squinting through my fingers to the soft ground.

I ended up staring at the small blades in curiosity, just when I realized that I was still able to feel and see..

..I am alive?

My eyes shifted to my mangled ship, along with the dull-eyed robot, which remained unmoving.

Two bright lights suddenly invaded my vision, and then another two.. and another, and another..

I hurriedly grabbed the robot, dragging myself behind the large, sturdy… building? with a fuzzy top, biting my lip to ignore the pain in my head and leg, peeking out.

The.. ships? flew… ran..? err.. slid.. SLID right past with fast-moving circles holding them up.

"Hem," I coughed, squeezing the robot. "Primitive.."

I glanced up to the ship that blinked overhead across the sky, disappearing again behind a building. "..How strange.."

"This is where it- LOOK! RIGHT THERE! THAT!"

I gasped again, tensing up against my new shelter, holding the robot tighter.

A deeper voice chuckled, "That is just a meteor, son."

"Meteor?! Are you kidding me?! It's purple and has some weird, alien insignia on it! And look at those! Those are definitely controls! And that seat! Dad, there's an alien around here, somewhere!"

A what?

"This is stupid. You're making me miss the Vampire Donut Special for THIS?"

"Gaz, how ignorant can you be?! How could you want to watch TV when this just happened?!"

"I want to watch TV. I'm going home."

"Gaz! Dad, don't you believe me?! Where are you two going?!"

"The news reporters can take care of the meteor, son. Let's go home."

The voice huffed, quiet. "Go home without me."

After what seemed like the longest moments of my life, I peeked out from behind the shelter again to catch a glimpse of the creature, spotting the spike atop of its head.

"HEY!"

I hid once again, looking here and there before I jumped up, dropping Gir behind me and pulling out the laser, pointing it as I narrowed my eyes, glancing around again for any other creatures.

"Gyah!" It dove behind my ruined ship.

I blinked, scowling and stepping forward cautiously, peeking around the ship and smoke quickly, preparing to fire, but I found.. nothing?

"HA!"

I twirled around, a clatter of metal on my wrist.

I stared down at it, shaking it more, then widening an eye at the creature that looked so proud.

In the next few moments, it's smile fell as it continued to watch. "..Wha.. Why aren't they working?! You should have been unconscious by now!"

I rattled the chain more, then whipped the metal at the creature, grunting as it dodged and sprinted.

"WAIT!" I spat, then attempted to pry off the metal, only hurting my wrist.

I shook the metal furiously, spinning around as I growled.

I eventually stopped, my balance completely off as my head hit the ground, a whine bubbling up from my throat.

"Stupid planet. Stupid creature," I mumbled, rolling over, still dizzy as I grabbed my laser that I had accidentally dropped, stumbling over to what was once my shelter and hitting the ground again face first, growling. "Stupid ground."

"What are you, ALIEN?"

I screamed in surprise from the voice, scrambling up and back, practically falling into the liquid behind me.

It pulled me forward, to which I pointed my laser at it again, shaky. "What are YOU?! Err.. ALIEN?"

"I asked you first!" It smacked at my weapon, to which I slapped it's claws back with a scowl.

"Mine." I pushed it a good distance away, then took in a breath. "Your atmosphere is rather difficult to breathe in. But it is not like I have not been on a worse planet. Tell me what the name of this planet is, what race mostly populates it, and if it has been taken already."

"Taken already?! Hyu-mans live here, you jerk!"

"AHAHA, I mean captured!"

"No! And it WON'T be, ALIEN! This is EARTH, where hyu-mans live peacefully without things like YOU coming to ruin everything. So get OFF of my planet!" It shoved me back rather harshly for a weak-looking creature.

Still, I scrambled back up, tense as I gripped the laser tighter, aiming it at the metal attached to my wrist.

I grabbed it before the strange object could fall, examining it. "What are these inferior weapons?"

It snatched the metal back. "Forget about it, ALIEN. Just leave."

"Leave? I do not think I will. Not yet." I stepped back towards the creature, circling it while fiddling with my weapon.

"Then I guess I have to try harder."

"I suppose so… But until then, answer my questions? I would absolutely hate to have to cut open your head without the appropriate environment or tools.."

The creature made somewhat of a twisted frown, but not quite a scowl. "You wouldn't learn anything from doing that.."

"I would so. Now answer what I asked!"

It huffed, glaring at me and crossing its arms. "Like I said, hyu-mans. HYU-MANS populate the planet."

"Then.. YOU are a hyu-man?"

"Duh! Now tell me what YOU are, or I'll-"

"No," I responded immediately, imitating it's pose.

"..What?"

"No! Why should I make a deal with some creature of another planet that practically attacked me?! What makes you think that YOU could do the same?! You are clearly oblivious and naïve to think that an Irken like I would not suddenly kill you from first GLANCE."

"Irken?"

"Hem?"

"You're Irken? What is that?"

"HOW DID YOU KNOW?! TELL ME HOW YOU-"

"YOU JUST SAID IT, moron."

"Well.. WELL. I MEANT to.. because.. a weak, little hyu-man like you would not be able to use the information against me anyhow. And from overhearing the conversation with your allies, I would say that you are highly questioned. Ignored, even. Now, OUT of my way." I pushed past it, hauling the dull-eyed robot over my shoulder. "I have a planet to tend to."

"Hold it!"

I scowled as it blocked my way again, aiming the laser. "Hold what?!"

"That means to STOP, IRKEN."

"Then why not just say stop?! And you are blocking my view of my.." I stared at the blinking lights in the distance with some sort of siren in the same direction, the harsh sound echoing. "You contacted your Earth defenses?!"

"Huh?" It looked behind itself towards the sirens. "Well, no." It then grinned back at me. "But I suppose this is a good thing the police are on their way.. to get YOU."

I slapped the claw away from my uniform, keeping the laser pointed at it for safety as I hurriedly clambered to my utterly destroyed ship. "Gyah.." I turned, searching through the mess for the self-destruct key, growling to myself from the debris that just kept piling on top of my progress.

"Evil, evil, EVIL atmosphere," I grumbled, then jumped up, defeated as I stepped back to the hyu-man. "Well.. I will make another deal with you, then? And actually keep my word this time? Heheh," I smiled sweetly from the glare.

"Why should I listen to YOU?"

I looked back towards the blasting sirens, then nervously paced. "Because.. because!"

"Is not an answer."

"Err..Because I.. could call off the invasion! Yes, billions upon billions of my fellow Irkens' ships are on their way right now, whom were following my lead! So.. if you ehm… Take me to your fortress and hide me! At least until I could figure out what I will do with all of you.. Ehm, I mean.. What I will do with myself.. Then I will cancel my forces."

"How do you contact them without a ship?"

"Err.. We communicate… telepathically?"

"…You're a really terrible liar, you know that?"

I grinned, keeping a tight hold on the yet-to-be-living machine as I followed after the hyu-man.


	2. Insulted, Dressy Invaders

_Defective_

CHAPTER 2

"I can't believe I'm harboring an ALIEN in my own house! How do I know you're not lying to me about the whole 'I can call off my Irken military' thing?! You're probably just waiting for them to get here and I'm completely wasting my time!"

"Do all hyu-mans speak just as much?"

It growled, gripping the knob to the door and slamming it. "No. My mind is just racing! There's a LIVE ALIEN in my room! Mysterious Mysteries would kill for this kind of evidence!"

I stood in confusion, widening an eye. "All I have heard was a brain running, a strange stranger and killing for blind endurance."

"..Then you have listening problems, idiot."

"What are these titles that you insist on labeling me as?!"

"Insults! I don't like you, and I wasn't given a name to begin with besides 'Irken'. Just like MY race is 'hyu-man', but we don't call each other that. We actually have NAMES."

"..And what makes you think Irkens do not have names?"

"Like I said, you didn't GIVE me- DON'T TOUCH THAT!"

I hurriedly dropped the strange-looking device, glancing back at the hyu-man in puzzlement.

"The laptop is off-limits! I don't know what slimy goo your skin secreets, so DON'T touch ANYTHING."

"Then how do I-?"

"You can still touch the FLOOR, st-"

"DIB!"

I jumped as a banging came from behind the door.

"DAD IS WORKING IN HIS LAB AND I'M TRYING TO WATCH A MOVIE! STOP TALKING TO YOURSELF!"

The creature waited for a few moments, then grabbed the dented 'laptop' away. "Mine," it mumbled.

"…Dib? Is that another insult?" I snickered.

"No.. That's a name."

"Dib?"

"Yeah, stop saying it!"

"Why?"

"It sounds weird when you say it.. But if Irkens have names, why not tell me yours?"

I scowled as if the creature had just insulted my antennae. "Why do you want to know?"

"Because YOU know mine. It's only fair."

"..No.. I do not know your name."

"Yes you do! You just said it!"

"I did not."

"Did so!"

"Even if I know it or not, DIB hyu-man, I do not see a good enough reason for ME to tell you MINE. It is unnecessary."

"I'd rather know it.. Then what do I call you? Alien? Irken? Doesn't that sound insulting at all to you?"

"No.. Though, what is alien? Another insult?"

"What..? No.. It's.. something.. that is… I guess just strange, foreign.."

"Ah.." I tapped my lip with a finger, shrugging. "No, not insulting at all. Erm…" I looked around at all of the dark walls. "What are.. those.. squares on the walls?"

"Posters..?" It looked behind itself to one of the four walls. "Oh. Yeah, posters. I like them, I don't know." It sat on the large, bouncy cushion, hugging the laptop.

"Hmn.." My eyes drifted here and there, then to the table that was buried in more.. posters? And sticks.. how strange.

My gaze landed back on the hyu-man, finding it staring. "..Eh?"

"There's an alien in my room.."

"Not very interesting."

"I just can't believe that this is happening!"

"I cannot believe that you are still speaking," I mumbled, more to myself.

"All of those hieroglyphics, and-and- Roswell, and-and the alien baby, and those weird formations on Mars! And-"

I started to ignore the rambling hyu-man, exploring once again.

My fingers felt along the unusual, new surfaces of the unfamiliar planet, taking in as much as I could before I was scolded again, turning back to pretend to listen again as the creature known as 'Dib' continued on as if I had not just been yelled at.

As it spoke, the thought occurred to me.. Is that a male or female? Calling a creature 'it' could get rather tiresome..

"Dib hyu-man," I interrupted, my fingers tightening around the robot's arm again, the act started turning into a habit for security. "Are you a female or male? I have constantly been referring to you an an 'it' to the audience."

"..Huh?"

"Nothing?"

"Um.. Well.." Dib looked around suspiciously now as if searching for hidden recording equipment, to which I smiled as it checked under the cushion. "A boy, duh. And what are you, a girl?"

I squinted, not understanding at ALL what the hyu-man had just said, swallowing. "I am.. Irken? Err... Does that mean that you are.. female, then? Eh.."

"No! Boy is male, girl is female! Get it?"

"Oh.. You are male, then.." I froze my thought process, rewinding the conversation. "..Wait.. What makes you think that I am female?! My antennae are simple in design!"

"..What? I mean.. You're practically wearing a dress."

Hyu-mans, Earth, Dib, boy, girl, laptop, posters, dress…?

"Let me guess.. You don't know what THAT means either.."

I shook my head as I reviewed each piece of newfound knowledge.

"It's clothing. THAT." It.. he pointed.

I stared at his finger, blinking. "That?"

"..What are YOU looking at? I'm pointing to your clothes!"

"Eh?"

"Gyuh.."

"..Gyuh..?"

He stood, stomping towards me and raising a hand.

I shielded my face, dropping the robot accidentally.

"This!"

I opened an eye, glancing down to my uniform that his claw was poking against.

"It's a dress. GIRLS wear them, and pink is a girly color too. Actually, these gloves could be considered girly also.. Do all Irkens have those eyes?"

I tilted my head, smacking away the wandering claws. "No, and I will have you know that this an Irken UNIFORM for invaders only. And you speak quite excessively."

"Just when I'm interested! You're an alien, it's crazy! And my race is going to think that you're a GIRL in that 'uniform'."

"..I do not find that as terrible as YOU do, by all means."

"Well.. It's terrible here. You'll be made fun of."

"Eh?"

"Um.. People will laugh at you, thinking you're strange."

"..People..? I thought that you were just speaking about.. hyu-mans..?"

"No! I mean.. yes.. People is just another word for hyu-mans. Don't worry about it."

"Oh.. But.. Why would they laugh? How is it strange?"

"I TOLD you. Only GIRLS wear dresses."

"Ehm.. I am still confused.."

"Then BE confused, because I'm not explaining every single little thing that you're CONFUSED about!"

I stared at the hyu-man, who just seemed to eagerly stare back, although it's tone seemed suddenly bothered.

"There's… an alien in my room," he mumbled, whispering below his breath.

My antennae perched themselves up as I caught it, narrowing an eye and fiddling with my gloved fingers. "I, ehm.. do not know what to say.."

"Good, because I have to try and get sleep anyway. Not like I will because of YOU, but I said I would try, right?"

The room suddenly got darker, if it was possible, to the point where the only light that leaked in was the source coming from outside.

My eyes adjusted of course, and I searched for the hyu-man, finding him back on the cushion, only under some sort of.. stretched out.. fuzzy-looking rectangle. With a fluffy head cushion.

"Sleep?"

"Yeah. Don't do anything funny. I want you to stay right there, and if I wake up in the middle of some Earth catastrophe because of a certain Irken invasion, you're IN for it."

In for what..? "Why would I try to make you laugh?"

"Hmph.." He hid his face once again.

I blinked in the dark, certainly puzzled as to what I should be doing. Not having a task can be quite bothersome.. Not BORING, but.. more along the lines of.. feeling absolutely useless.

And that is JUST how I will feel for the next.. HOW MANY HOURS?!


	3. Breakfast on Pluto, Giggling Vampires

_Defective_

CHAPTER 3

Dib groaned as he stepped out of the room, rubbing his eyes. "Don't wanna go to skool so early.. Stupid idea.." He groggily felt his way down the stairs and to the kitchen, sighing and sitting in a chair beside the other hyu-man. "Morning, Gaz.."

"Whatever."

Once he was given a bowl of cereal and spoon, he mumbled a 'thank you', taking a scoop, about to eat, but dropped the utensil immediately, staring back up at me with a gawk.

I blinked at him, then down at the spoon he was strangely not moving to eat with. "..What? Is that the wrong tool..?"

"ALIEN! I MEAN.." He covered his mouth, then waved in 'Gaz's' occupied face. "Gaz! GAZ! Do you see it?! LOOK! THAT ALIEN FROM LAST NIGHT I TRIED TO TELL YOU AND DAD ABOUT! THAT CRASH, RE-"

"BE QUIET. I already saw it. He gave me breakfast, now leave me alone."

"Huh..?" He stared again, then examined his own food suspiciously, suddenly annoyed? "I thought I told you to stay in my room!"

Assuming that the hyu-man beside him did not care.. "I did not come to this planet to take orders from YOU, Dib hyu-man. And I was curious, that is all.." I observed the quiet hyu-man who repeatedly pressed the controls of some sort of smaller laptop, sitting beside.. her? "Besides.. This 'Gaz' hyu-man seems trustworthy enough to be safe around."

"AHA, don't kid around." He stuffed a mound of the cereal into his mouth.

I watched curiously, then peeked at the hyu-man beside him.

"Anyway, I'm heading off to skool in a couple minutes, so I'm not sure what I'm going to do with you yet."

"I can take care of myself, hyu-man," I grumbled, then poked at the device that the other was occupying itself with.

A hand immediately whipped across my face.

I covered the stinging area, staring wide-eyed.

"Don't touch my game. GOT IT?"

"Got.. what?"

Once the hyu-man started growling, an eye opening at me, Dib pulled me from the kitchen. "First rule while you're here. Stay away from Gaz. Second rule, don't touch my stuff. Third rule, don't-"

I scowled at the long 'list' of rules, my eyes wandering around the room, looking anywhere but at the bothersome hyu-man.

"Yes, yes, I understand. Just leave to wherever you are leaving to."

"Skool." He picked up some sort of square Pak, bringing the strap over his shoulder. "You better be here by the time I get back."

I watched him, unintentionally dark until my brain started to work again. "Why would I leave?"

Dib stared me up and down, then made a small noise in his throat before shouting, "Gaz! You coming?"

"I'm walking alone so I don't have to be embarrassed by YOU."

He frowned then, waiting for the other as he looked me over once more, then shut the door behind them.

I listened for the conversation, pressing myself up against the door.

Once I heard them far away enough, I raced to the stairs, practically stumbling over the top step with a grunt. I entered the Dib's room, scooping up the lifeless robot.

I slowly stepped down into the.. laboratory?, glancing around cautiously. I would be lucky to be able to find the right tools to-

"Why, hello there!"

I froze, slowly looking up to the tall.. hyu-man? that I had to bend my whole self back to look at.

"Are you lost, little girl?"

I squeaked, only able to force out incomprehensible sounds, completely shocked from how TALL this creature was.. wait a minute.. GIRL?!

I scowled, a bit less confidently than I thought it would show towards this creature. "I am a male! I..ehm..was invited..to this fortress! Yes. For.. a social.. gathering?"

The creature chuckled, patting my head with it's gloved hand.

"I see.. One of Dib's foreign friends, then! You have the oddest skin and eyes.."

I swallowed from the sudden heavier atmosphere on my shoulders. "Err.. my people are.. far away and all look very similar!"

"Oh? I have never heard of such a place! Fascinating! But I'm entirely too busy right now, working and all.. So it's best that you leave."

"Wait! Could I, ehm.. Fix my.. toy? It is broken.."

Another chuckle. "Oh, these tools are not for fixing toys, honey! These tools are for SCIENCE!"

"Could I.. try to fix my toy anyways?"

"Oh, no, no! This room is much too dangerous for a child of your age. We don't want you getting hurt now, do we? Run along, now."

I was halfway up the stairs as I glowered back at the creature.

So many insults at once.

* * *

"He removed the flesh and insides of his dead lover, sucking out the marrow-"

Just before Dib could lose his lunch, he raised his hand. "Miss Bitters?" he interrupted, covering his mouth for a moment, wincing. "What does this have to do with Romeo and Juliet?"

".. This is the Jhonen Vasquez version, ignorant child."

"This guy needs help," he grumbled, holding his throat.

As if the Heavens answered his calls, the bell rang, quite LOUDLY, in fact.

Time to escape jail and go home to his newly discovered alien!

He actually smiled for once inside the school walls as he stepped out the door, blind to the children that ran and pushed by him, insults spitting here and there. 'Overachiever', 'big head', 'nerd', 'creep', 'crazy'..

Well. None of that mattered. Nor did the mouths that the words came from. And certainly not the children that were so stupid, so ignorant and so cruel.. None of that mattered.

Because he found a REAL ALIEN.

His smile only grew, stretching his cheeks from the blissful thoughts of fame and fortune pouring down on him, the praise from his newly open-minded father, the new position in his network, the-

He stopped in his tracks as a certain chill in the air skimmed his arm.

He looked back immediately, narrowing his eyes to the child that had passed by, covered in a cloak that dragged behind him.

Dib had to stare as the red-haired child made his way down the sidewalk, the others around him seeming to completely naïve to the fact that he was wearing strange clothing.

'Well.. It's not the weirdest thing I've seen around here..' Dib puckered his lip. He really wanted to get home, but..

He turned, starting to follow the child like the stalker he had become over the previous years.

Once the cloak-wearing male stopped short on a crosswalk however, Dib froze, hurriedly whistling and checking his nails.

A car beeped at the child, who screamed and ran to the other side of the street, then continued to walk as though nothing happened.

Dib stared, then eyed the children around him, finding their faces like always.. ignorant. The drivers going by seemed to not notice either.

He shook his head in disappointment, rolling his eyes like he has done so many times before.

Some days the whole world seems to lack intelligence.

Other days, sometimes you really DO want an alien race to come invade and destroy the planet to rid the universe of at least a small percentage of stupidity.. But perhaps most of it IS on Earth..

Not that hard to believe, actually.

Dib shook himself out of his thoughts, finding that he had walked quite a long way from the intersection.

Thinking too deeply is definitely dangerous...

Dib stopped again and blinked as he tried to find the child he was stalki- err.. following.

"Where did he go..?" he asked himself.

"Who are we following?"

Dib nearly blasted out of his boots from the whisper, stumbling over his backpack, papers flying.

The child covered his cracked lips with a ghostly hand, a small amused smile hidden behind his fingers. "I-I'm sorry, did I frighten you?"

He collected his papers hurriedly before they could get away with the help of the wind from the cars that flew by, gripping his math textbook that unfortunately landed in a puddle.

The child above him just so happened to be picking up the same book, to apparently help the disgruntled other.

Dib blinked at the hand, following up the arm it was attached to, then stared at the other's dark abysses for eyes, purple glows in the middle serving as pupils.

Dib screamed then in shock, scrambling away, which only caused his papers to escape from his backpack once again.

His face smacked down into the mud as he attempted to bolt, lifting his head up to get back on his feet, shrieking as the creature was spotted over him again, staring down at him.

"What?! Is there something in my teeth?!" He then opened his mouth, rubbing his teeth to rid himself of imaginary plaque.

The fangs poking out caused Dib to go berserk, unable to scream anymore, spazzing and flipping like a fish out of water as his mouth struggled to form words.

The red-haired child watched him flop, his brow scrunching. "..Is this how children have seizures nowadays..?" he spoke aloud, watching him for a few more moments before taking ahold of the hyu-man by his hair, lifting him up.

His limbs collapsed inward as his 'seizure' halted, settling with a gawk instead.

"Why are you freaking out? I didn't mean to scare you! If it's your backpack and stuff you're upset over, I could easily get you a-"

Dib swallowed the twisted knot that was lodged in his throat, finally finding his voice. "NO! I just..! You're..!"

"Oh yeah.. I know. I kind of figured that, but I don't like blaming every single little thing on that."

"But how..? Why are you..? Why did you..?" Maybe his voice was not completely caught up with him just yet.

"Are you.. going to finish any of those questions? I can't exactly read your mind, if that's what all of you assume.."

"No, I wasn't assuming that! I, um.. I just.. just.."

"Don't swallow your tongue! SPIT IT OUT!"

Dib's boots met the ground again, wiping his face and glasses with his sleeve. "I-I'm sorry! I just can't believe what's going on! First the Irken, now a vampire! The next thing I know, fairies and demons will run into me tomorrow!" He hurriedly cleared his throat, wiping at his cheek again. "Sorry. I'm Dib, paranormal investigator of the Swollen Eyeball Network, also known as the S.E.N. Nice to meet you!"

The vampire looked down to the shaky, held out hand that was coated in mud. "Paranormal.." he repeated, seeming to consider shaking the hand, but turned away, using a hand to block Dib from his view. "Well, nice meeting you! Gotta run! Bye-bye now!"

Dib's eyes snapped open wide as he quickly got his soaked belongings back together, dumping them into his bag and following after the retreating creature. "Wait!"

"Nope, sorry! Can't talk right now!"

"But I HAVE to know you! Let me talk to you! This is such a special opportunity! A LIFETIME opportunity!"

"We're sorry. We could not transfer your call. Please hang up the phone and never call back ever again. Thank you!"

"NO, don't leave! WAIT! No, NO, NO!" He gasped as he nearly ran right into a busy street after him. "WAIT!"

By the time the sign changed to 'walk', he was already halfway across the street, nearly spraining his ankle as he stepped the wrong way on the edge of the sidewalk, ignoring the split pain as he sprinted onward, only to skid to a stop, the dirt he kicked up floating behind him.

As he searched for the missing vampire, his spirits dropped, his face and head following, thunder booming above him.

* * *

I jolted from the crashing in the sky, my eyes blurring as I felt liquid continue to trail down my cheeks.

Only weather.. Only weather.. Only weather..

That is what the Gaz hyu-man had told me.. Natural weather. Not bombs. Not a war. Though the flashes acted as fire, and the crackles pretended to be explosions.. there was not a war.

A bang from the door caused me to jump once again, my eyes focusing on the dripping hyu-man, who was covered in.. in.. something similar to sludge.

Through my leaking, I had to laugh from his state, until he lifted his head to reveal his frown.

I closed my mouth, settling back to my leaking.

Dib shut the door behind him before another flash lit up the room, followed by the crackling.

I swallowed and wiped away the liquid as the Dib hyu-man dropped his square Pak, stepping over to me, tugging on my sleeve, then turned to the stairs.

I stood and trailed after him, gripping the railing to the stairs.

* * *

"Why were you crying?"

"Why were YOU late from 'skool'?"

He sighed, his shoulders drooping as he sat on the spinning chair, moving himself back and forth. "I ran into someone on my way home.. I didn't know him, but.. I don't know what I was thinking. He was just weird, I guess. So, I found out he was.." he immediately laughed, "a vampire.." He licked his lips, his eyes locked on his fingers. "He got away, though.."

I smiled and nodded, pretending to at least-

"You don't understand at all, do you?"

I shook my head, though I continued to smile.

"Then.. nevermind. But still! First you, then him? It's just too much of a coincidence! This just can't be possible, I mean-"

I started to ignore the rant from the hyu-man like I have done many times before, only nonsense coming from his mouth.

Another flash and crackle caused a tear to involuntarily roll down my face, dripping on my uniform.

_I gasped as I turned and bolted, my whole universe seeming to slow down as the bomb ticked away, it's deadly contents ready to spread and destroy in a matter of seconds._

_I leaped behind a pile of what was once a building, rolling and immediately holding onto myself as the eruption began._

_I screamed, the light blinding and the bang deafening._

_My eyes opened wide as I witnessed the skin peel away from the oblivious Irkens, pangs filling my insides as their skeletons still held on for dear life._

"Hey.. Hey! Are you alright? Why are you crying? Or why were you? Hello?"

I blinked as I glanced from the hyu-man to his own uniform. "Why are you greeting me? I have been here.."

"Well, sorry. I was just trying to get your attention.. It looked like you saw a ghost or something."

"Ehm?"

"..Nothing.. So.. why were you crying? Um.. are?"

"I do not know what that means, but I will assume wandering, so.. I wanted to explore-"

"No, crying means THAT."

"..Means.. WHAT?"

"That! That water coming from your eyes!"

"Water..?" I mumbled as I wiped more of the offensive liquid away. "I am not sure why. It is just happening, Dib hyu-man.." I then smirked, even though the hyu-man had cleaned himself of the filth. "Why were you covered in.. in..?"

"Mud, I know. I fell.. Probably cracked my glasses, too.." He checked the circular devices perched on the bump in the middle of his face.

I am NOT going to ask..

"Are you going to tell me your name yet?"

"I already explained to you that my name is unnecessary. Do not ask me for it anymore."

"But-"

"No."

"But-!"

"NO, Dib hyu-man!"

* * *

_I opened my eyes to the white light, the need to breathe strangely vanishing. _

_I was floating.. completely weightless._

_And as the comfortable light filled my eyes, I then felt myself.. _

_Falling._

I gasped as I jolted upright, my throat locked inside of itself.

I gripped where my voice was supposed to form, my eyes wide.

Well, that was a rather strange.. experience.

I had only happened once or twice in the past few decades or so, but.. I had never really thought about it before.

Somehow falling unconscious without a real cause. Much like the Dib hyu-man on his cushion, almost as if he prepares for it to happen..

And then I picture myself falling.. And I jump, realizing it had never happened.

But.. what exactly was that?

I turned my head to the hyu-man, who, like the other day, was on the cushion, snuggled up under that furry skin rectangle, but his head was now placed beside the head cushion.

"Mn.." My throat managed, my limbs still frozen in cold fright.

But from what?

Surely not from falling. Falling is something that I have gotten used to.. Whether it be falling from ships, cliffs or simply just a stumble.. One would be surprised of how much tolerance my body has developed to falling.

..So why be afraid of a simple stumble?

The longer I thought about it, the more liquid bunched up in my vision, threatening to escape.

I laid back down in the warmth that I had left on the ground, scrunching back up to it, though I stayed by the cold robot, the eyes staring back.

I blinked at them, finding them much more comfortable than the heated ground beneath me.

My arms wrapped around the robot's head, hugging it protectively.

"Mine."

* * *

"Seems that your little meteor discovery was recorded in the paper, son! Congratulations!"

"Dad. It was a spaceship. Not a meteor. And it's probably going to be covered up the FBI anyway. Besides, no one even knows that I discovered it first. It doesn't even matter."

It's not that he wasn't excited to have been the first one to discover the ship, but it would have just been useless to try and convince the news reporters that the 'meteor' wasn't a meteor at all.

His father stared before laughing heartily, patting his son's head. "Always has been the one with a great imagination! Run along, now. Go play blocks with your sister."

"Dad.." he sighed. "I'm twelve. We haven't played together since we were-"

"That's nice, son. Go play with your little foreign friend," he chuckled.

Dib glared at his unknowing father who flipped the next few pages in the newspaper, taking a sip from his coffee mug.

"Fine.." He stepped out of the kitchen, passing by Gaz to the stairs.

"Hey," Gaz called, turning around and opening an eye. "How long is your 'alien' staying?"

Dib shrugged, then smiled, not believing that his sister actually spoke to him without any insults included.

"Whatever."

* * *

Dib practically skipped into his room from his suddenly good mood.

I looked up to him, raising an antenna. "Err.. Why are you-?"

"Happy?" he nearly screamed in my face.

I shielded myself from any harm that could be produced from a happy hyu-man.

"Because I just REMEMBERED that there's someone going to visit to help me track down that VAMPIRE that I ran to. So YOU'RE," he poked the middle of my face quickly, "going to meet him." He then crossed his arms, tapping his chin. "Though, I didn't mention you, so don't freak out if he attacks you at first. I didn't wanna say anything because for one, I wanted you to be a surprise, and TWO, you never know what's going on with the FBI looking through private emails and whatnot.. They're bound to be suspicious with YOUR ship buried in the park."

"Buried?"

"Crashed, I mean.. The police put their tape around it."

Once again, I sat in confusion as I struggled to absorb everything he had just said.. Absolutely nothing making any sense.. in MY universe, at least.

"Ehm.. I did not really plan for this story to move so quickly, so.. can you just, err.. pretend that.. 'he' is not coming yet?"

"..Story..? What are you..?" He looked around suspiciously, then pointed. "I KNEW IT! YOU'RE RECORDING THIS WHOLE THING, AREN'T YOU?! What story?! What are you talking about?! Tell me RIGHT now!"

I grinned and shrugged. "I ehm.. meant.. Well, I record things in my head, and.. being on this planet.. Everything is moving too fast, that is all!" I snickered to myself from his face.

"…I don't believe a WORD that you just said.. I'm ON to you.. IRKEN."


	4. See No Evils, Speak No Evils

_Defective_

CHAPTER 4

"But if.. she? Teaches you false information, is that not.. bad?"

"Yeah, 'Miss' means she, you were right. And I don't know.. She kind of just.. gives us a rant and quizzes on the real lesson in the end. A LOT of kids fail her class every year."

Quizzes.. quizzes…

"Evaluates your knowledge?"

Dib nodded, holding his head up in a palm, swinging a leg in the air gently. "I swear, if the school board doesn't do anything about her, I might stay back and then my dad will be humiliated by his failure son and will probably disown me."

I squinted, licking my lips as I tried to make sense of what he-

"Just pretend you know what I'm talking about."

"How about you just eat your food and be quiet?" Gaz threatened, glaring at him.

"I do not mind him speaking.."

Gaz sent her glare at me, silent.

I stared back at her, then inched towards the Dib hyu-man for protection.

I feel so powerless.. but that's how one would feel when they find out that their Paks have been mysteriously cleared of its weapons.

But not ALL of them, heh..

"Gaz, just calm down, he doesn't know any better!"

I scowled, my antennae flattening against my head. "And what makes you say that?"

"Hey, don't YOU turn against me now! I'm on your side!"

I stared, looking him up and down, then glared. "Of course you are! You are right THERE."

"No, I mean.. Gyah.. nevermind." He rolled his eyes before getting up, stepping to the sink and twisting the faucet. "Gaz, you can at least be a bit nicer. He's safe, so you don't have to be so hostile around him, like al-"

A.. bell? rang just then in the 'room of living'.

"Oh, jeez.." Dib washed some of the white foam off of his hands in a hurry, hanging them over the sink as he searched. "Gaz, can you go get a towel?"

"No."

"Then can you at least answer the-!"

"Leave me alone." She stood from the chair, dropping her utensil and.. and.. oh yes! Her bowl into the sink, which clattered and splashed the Dib hyu-man again with the liquid, erasing his progress of drying off.

She then stepped out of the kitchen, leaving Dib rather annoyed.

"Um.." He shook his hands once again. "Irken? Can you go, um.. Get a.. towel from the upstairs closet? In the bathroom?"

He stared back at my blank expression. "Jesus Christ!" He wiped his hands on his uniform, then pointed to the kitchen doorway as the bell rang once again. "Go upstairs, hurry!"

"Should I still, ehm.. Find a -?"

"Yes, whatever! Just go!"

* * *

'A towel.. A towel… What on Irk is a towel? What on Irk was a BATHroom?'

I searched each and every room, reaching the Gaz's room.. 'Off Limits' both of them had said. But why?

I ached to peek inside, fidgeting and finally deciding against it. The urge can wait.

'A towel..' I looked in the next room with some sort of reflection square, sink, and a chair with a.. cap? With more water inside.. And a.. well, I am not sure how to describe it, err.. other then it looked like .. a.. large rectangle.. with another faucet. And another door.

I peeked in, spotting small bottles and mini.. fuzzy rectangle skins that the Dib hyu-man uses on his cushion.

Ehm.. Fuzzy rectangle skins did not sound close to towels.

I shrugged and exited the room, shutting the door and trying to think of what word 'towel' was close to..

"Yeah, you'll love him. He's right in- HEY!"

I fumbled with the many objects in my grasp, ending up dropping all of them.

"Why are you looking through all of my stuff?!"

"I-I was only looking for a towel! But I did not know what you meant, so I, ehm.. tried to.. collect.. things that sounded like..-"

"..Just forget it. Look, this is my friend from Cape May. He's-"

"That is definitely NOT a boy."

I stiffened with a scowl at the new coming hyu-man.

"..Yeah, it's a boy," he mumbled quickly. "And Drayne's staying with me for a while to help-"

"Wait, 'Drayne'?!" I questioned, tense.

"Yeah," Dib grumbled, apparently bothered that I keep interr-"

"I will make sure to make you absolutely pathetic in this version," I snickered, crossing my arms.

Dib growled again from the inter-

I HAVE THE POWER! MUAHAHA!

The hyu-man threw his hands up in the air with a huff. "Nevermind! Just meet!"

"But I thought that I told you to pretend that he was not coming here y-"

"INTERRUPTING," Drayne spoke quickly.

"But.. You cannot do that! **I** am the writer!"

"..What..?"

"He says things like that," Dib explained.

I glared, placing my hands on my sides. "Stupid hyu-mans."

A leer stitched itself into my lips from the glare that Drayne shot.

OH YES, Drayne. I know that is an insult. You are not hyu-man at all. AHAHA, maybe I should just spoil the whole ending now, so I won't end up hit over the head like last t-"

"Irken, was it?"

..When is that vampire supposed to come in again?

"How did YOU-?"

"I told him. He's helping me out around here after all, so I think he deserves to know."

"Oh.. I suppose.."

I might as well just make these hyu-mans bow to me anyhow. Heh, the power of a pen.

"So, we're going to go track down that vampire that got away a few weeks ago." He was talking more to the Drayne 'hyu-man' now then to me.

..I do not remember the Dib hyu-man being so interested in VAMPIRES. He was SUPPOSED to be obsessed with ME.

I could not help but glare at the thoughts of jealousy that planted themselves inside of my head, my face contorting into that of a disgusted scowl.

Drayne was watching me though, rather then listening to the Dib hyu-man's.. plans.

I narrowed my eyes, sticking my tongue out as I dropped, gathering the fallen objects in my arms, standing once again and placing them back in their respectful positions.

Stupid Drayne.. Stupid missing vampire.. It would all be much simpler if they were not even here.

I paused, thinking about such an evil idea, then voted against it, deciding that the introductions of them would have been useless, if they had just, AHEM, 'disappeared'.

..Maybe I should plan better before writing anything else down.

"What is this?"

"Don't ask me, it's HIS."

".. I'm still thinking that thing is a girl."

I whipped around at that comment, about to yell at him until I realized he was touching my robot with his FILTHY, disgusting, germy hands.

"So, what is this? Isn't a robot supposed to move?"

I snatched Gir from him, holding the robot securely. "MINE. And he is just broken! Do not touch him!"

"Oh, it's a 'he'? An alien taking a liking to a robot? Sounds pretty farfetched to me."

"Then play fetch as far as you WANT, because there is nothing wrong with one liking their robot! N-Not that I do! I am.. just.. protecting Irken property! That is all.."

"Huh. SURE."

..Maybe my thoughts and this pen are not as connected as I originally had thought..

I only scowled as he continued to pretend to listen to the Dib hyu-man rant on.. and on.. AND ON! GYAH!

"Wait, not ALL vampires have cloaks. They can wear whatever they want to wear. Maybe this 'vampire' isn't a vampire at all. Just playing a trick on people."

"Look, I know what I saw! How can you explain the fangs?"

"Part of the costume. He probably bought them."

AHA, I did not know that he was ACTUALLY listening.. Who COULD for that long?

"Then what about the cold air all of a sudden?"

"Look.. You said you were near a road, right? There were probably a whole bunch of cars making gusts of wind."

"No, it's just different! Like.. it made my whole body shiver! The hair on the back of my neck stood up! It was like a rush of energy, it-"

"Hey!" Drayne intervened, silent as he waited for a few moments, then narrowed an eye. "You're acting as if I don't believe in vampires."

"Well.. You're kind a doubting every-"

"Yeah! Yeah, I'm doubting it."

Doubting..?

"I'm DOUBTING it because when you're a paranormal investigator, you have to think in all directions, take the environment into consideration, and be the biggest skeptic in the world. Because if you're NOT, you'll be falling for every little thing that people come to you with. And you know what? That's when you're played around with, which links to paranormal investigators being treated as a big JOKE.. Gullibility; Stay away from it. And I'm not saying that I DON'T believe in vampires. I believe in them, but not believe in them, but not until there's physical evidence laid out in front of me. Saying that you saw one just isn't enough."

"..Alright, alright. I get it.. But.. what about his eyes? They were completely black, only the middle-"

"Contacts."

"..Right.. So.. you came ALL this way just to tell me you doubt it?"

"Yup." He stood, leaving the empty notepad and pencil, pulling down.. glasses? over his eyes. "But that doesn't mean that we're not looking for evidence anyway."

Dib's frown disappeared, his eyes lighting up behind his glasses.

"But while we're looking for Mister 'Creepy-Eyes', who's going to watch the alien?"

I pursed my lips from the stares, still protecting the robot.

Still jealous.. not supposed to be this way..

"Oh, he's fine by himself. I leave him here when I go to skool."

"..Let me get this straight… You leave an alien home alone WITHOUT anyone watching him?"

Dib blinked, his brow furrowing. "Well.. I don't see anything wr-"

"I'll rephrase the question. You allowed a strange alien, whose name you don't even know yet, to venture around your house, having access to your room, your father's lab, AND would be free to just waltz right out the door and destroy the PLANET while YOU were at skool?"

"Well.. Now you're just making me sound irresponsible.."

"Hm. Seems like that, doesn't it? You have to keep him somewhere."

"Well, if he really wanted to leave, he would have already left!"

"..I guess.. But-"

"I am still ALIVE AND LISTENING! Do not speak as if I am not HERE! AND.. What are those things on your head?"

"Night vision goggles, of course."

"Hmph.." I tilted my head from the strange goggles. Night vision..?

"Why are you looking for a vampire? And why with those?"

"We're paranormal investigators! We just do. And the goggles are for seeing in the DARK. It's not that hard," Dib mumbled, crossing his arms. "So, what do I do with him?"

"Well.. there's nothing you really CAN do right now.. Unless you wanted to bring him, but I wouldn't recommend that. It's kind of obvious that he's an alien."

"Right.. um.. Nevermind. I'll just ask my sister to watch him.."

"Well, you know how THAT'S going to turn out."

* * *

"Come on, Gaz! It's only for an hour or so! And he's not any trouble!"

"You interrupted my vampire doughnut special."

"What? You're still holding that against me? Gaz, it's been weeks!"

"It's ALSO been weeks since my vampire doughnut special."

Dib sighed. "Look, I'm sorry, okay? I just need you to watch him. Can you do that?"

"Whatever."

Drayne exchanged a glance between the hyu-man, ready to leave.

I stayed beside the child who kept her eyes trained on the screen, fidgeting to keep myself at ease.

Once the hyu-mans left, I glanced up to her, observing her shut eyes. "Erm.. How might you be able to see, if-?"

"Be quiet."

I frowned, looking back down to keep to myself.

* * *

"People keep staring at us! Doesn't that bother you?"

"No. And who wouldn't stare? We look crazy running around with these goggles."

That made him laugh for at least a bit, until he found Drayne studying the goggles. "..What?"

"Where exactly did you get these?"

"Um.. I ordered them.."

"From where?"

"From the back of Crops Circles Magazine.."

"Right.. Their stuff is so cheap."

"It's.. not.. Look, I don't want to fight with-"

"I'm not fighting with you. I'm just telling you the truth."

"..Okay.. Sorry."

"It's alright. Let's just find that vampire of yours, huh?"

Dib nodded, not knowing whether to smile or frown.

* * *

I stared at the door in front of me, considering the consequences.

Aha! There are none! I have been here before! I know my way around..

And when I realized that I have travelled too far away from the door, I stopped and could only observe my environment, the long, everlasting surface I stood on with the two bright lights seeming to expand.

I blinked at them, my eyes wide.

..Was that some sort of.. alerting sound?

Something shoved me from my right, toppling over me as the loud, alarming noise flew by.

I grunted from my numbed arm that took the most impact, clutching it and composing myself, glaring intensely at the black mass. "HOW DARE YOU..-" I silenced myself as I realized who the cloak-wearing child was, tilting my head. "That vampire," I mumbled, narrowing my eyes as I realized he had been the one who had shoved me.

"Wow, you're welcome!" He stood, flipping his cloak back over his head, rubbing his eyes. "Usually people THANK me for saving their lives, but you-"

I swallowed at the pause, covering my injury. "..What?"

"ALIEN!" he suddenly screamed, whipping at me with the squirming cloak.

I smacked at the offensive cloth, holding my cheek from the slap.

He then shielded himself with his cloak, peeking out.

"Erm.." I clutched the arm to my chest, ignoring the stinging on the side of my face. "Why did you hit me?"

The vampire continued to stare, the cloak swaying rather nervously.

"..You can speak English..?" he asked quietly, the alarm now long gone.

"English.." I repeated, narrowing an eye at the strange word. "Err.. I am not certain?"

"But you are! You're.." He looked me up and down, not making a move to uncover himself. "Why are you here?"

I smiled then, just content with the fact that I was not being tackled to the ground, having the life sucked out of me like the FIRST time. "Well, I could ask the same of you."

The vampire kept his guard and cloak up under his eyes, just so he could study me. "I was walking through the park to see that thing the police were keeping off-limits, but.. it was gone, and.. then these children with weird, alien equipment scared me, so I ran, and then I saw YOU about to be hit by a car!"

One of my eyes remained wider than the other as I tried to process what the creature had just explained to me..

"..What?"

"Eh.. I do not.. understand very well."

"Then.. Whatever! Now why are YOU here?" He shifted to his right, slowly ending up on my other side away from the.. well, from that long, stretched.. surface.

A car..?

"I.. err.." I tapped my lip, frowning as I tried to cleverly think up a lie.

Ah!

"I was sent here, yes! On a mission to, ehm.. Destroy this planet!"

I snapped my head back to him after the next slap, staring at his uneasy abysses for eyes. "No, do not feel too.. ehm.. alarmed! I have-"

I growled again from yet another whip, holding my stinging face once again. "STOP-"

I gripped the cloak's end as it was about to strike this time, then caught the other, glaring. "QUIT ATTACKING AND LISTEN!"

The vampire shakily kept his arms across for protection.

"I was sent here to destroy, YES, but I do not have the right resources because I have crashed my ship, and, well.. I have been.. stranded here."

"Crashed?" he finally spoke again, his cloak struggling in my clutches.

After he had gotten the squirming ends free, he swallowed, bringing his face a bit closer, narrowing his eyes. "You say that you were sent here, yet you crashed?"

"Err.. your planet's atmosphere was very.. unstable. And in breaching, my ship, well.. lost control."

"I see.. but.. why were you sent.. here? Why Earth? What makes this planet so..?"

"..So..?"

"Sh!"

"..Sh?"

"Be quiet!"

"Why?" I tilted my head to his sudden, quiet tone.

He hurriedly made some sort of wave with his hand before sprinting.

I stared in confusion for a few moments, then started to follow, my antennae lifting as they caught the voices.

My legs powered themselves faster as they caught up with the vampire who dove behind a fluffy, spiky? ehm.. well, it looked like the top of those shelters that seemed to be around the area.

I followed, lowering my voice as I stayed close, although he still seemed unnerved. "Why are you so afraid of them? They are only hyu-mans searching for… Oh.. Ehm, I just remembered! They are looking for you!"

"Why?!" he practically gasped, seeming so out of character.

I blinked towards his nervous, claw-gnawing face. ".. Why are you so afraid..?" I asked once again, the fear radiating from him seeming to cause my own body to react in panic.

"Look, I ran into one of them not too long ago, and they kind of freaked me out, talking all paranormal and crap.. And the other, well.. Just look at the thing on his head! And his hair doesn't look too friendly! Or the other's!"

"Erm.. Yes, of course! I understand completely, heh.." I blinked as he only narrowed his eyes at me. "..Fine! I do not! But-"

"Sh!" He held a finger to his lips, the pointed.

I peeked through our shelter to the hyu-mans.

"I thought I heard something over here."

"Well, we're near the woods. You'll hear a LOT of sounds."

"No, I mean whispering!"

"Animals could sound like that."

"I know, but.. Nevermind." The Dib hyu-man frowned, stepping in our direction cautiously.

Drayne observed the area, but followed. "Wanna go check in the woods?"

Dib looked back at him then, confusion painted across his brow. "Why the woods?"

"I don't know.. It's creepy? And I bet vampires would be there.. Maybe get more of those 'Bigfoot' sightings of yours on camera?"

"I guess.. But.. wait! Why would vampires be hanging out in the woods? And this isn't the same woods I spotted Bigfoot in! Drayne! Hey, wait!"

Once they were far away enough, the vampire hopped out, shaking and brushing off his clothes quickly in.. disgust? Fear? Hard to explain..

And then the thought occurred to me..

I looked down to my hand where Gir would usually be hanging from, impatiently waiting to be fixed.

"My robot.." I mumbled wide-eyed, panic immediately taking place.

"Robot..?" the vampire questioned, just as he was about to run in the opposite direction of the hyu-mans.

"Yes! He is MISSING! Where has he gone!?" I frantically searched the shelter we had hid behind, only receiving cuts along my arms from what appeared to be tangles of spikes.

"Um.. I have to leave, but-"

One of my robotic appendages shot out from my Pak, gripping the retreating creature by his cloak's collar, glaring. "Help me find Gir or I dismantle your limbs."

He watched in absolute fright, his legs wobbling.

"WELL?"

The creature hurriedly nodded, smiling uneasily.

I released him, looking here and there for the lost machinery.

First my ship, now my robot..

Tears found their way to my eyes as I scanned the area for him.

"What.. was that thing coming out of your back? You looked like some messed up spider with a pink.."

I ignored him, stepping towards the stretching surface.

After making sure that the two lights were not making their way towards me, I stepped onto the smooth, lined ground, grabbing what was once Gir's arm.. Now a crushed mess of wires and scrap metal.

He stayed beside me, gazing at it curiously.

I turned away, protecting it from his view. "I do not remember naming the ruined arm of a robot 'Gir'.."

The vampire's smile lost its shine as cold silence chased away the chirps and whispers of the creatures all around us.

"I.. I think you're missing most of-"

"I REALIZE THAT," I snapped, unable to help the glower that had established as I watched his glee dissipate.

He watched me for a few more moments, then looked up to the two lights, pulling me aside.

The strange object screamed as it zipped by, much like the first one.

I ripped my arm away from the other's grip. "Perhaps that creature had taken the rest of him away.."

"Creature? What.. um.. creature?" he asked, quivering from the gust that was created.

The wind, unlike HIM, did not faze me as I looked after the large object. "That creature that we had just dodged!"

"You mean a car..? I thought I already told you what that was.. And that doesn't even make any sense, I mean.. That was a completely different car then before."

"That does not matter!"

"Actually, it DOES, so…"

"Silence! **I** decide what matters.. but.. I do not see Gir.."

"Alien, I know your robot is important or something, but.. I can't stay out here."

"Zim," I mumbled, stepping along where the 'car' had disappeared to.

"What?"

"ZIM. I do not enjoy being called 'ALIEN'."

"So.. is that your name or something? Or a race, or-"

"Aaa… name. Yes. Zephyr, was it?"

He nodded, squinting in the direction I was facing. "Well, Zim," he practically whispered, "could I help you look for him tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow?"

"Yes, when it's light out again."

Light out..

I glanced up to the vast sea of stars, just realizing that the planet was swallowed in darkness.

Besides the bright planet in the sky..

Ignoring that.

"I am not completely sure what you are speaking about.. But I cannot risk having your planet's defenses capture my robot! YOU are the one who made me lose him, now YOU help me FIND him!"

"Look, you have to understand… Mortals are STUPID. If anyone ever finds your robot, nobody would take it. Don't worry."

Mortals..? Oh yes! He used to call hyu-mans that.. For what reason, I have no idea.

"We'll look for him first thing tomorrow, okay?"

I nodded, though I truly did not understand a word. "Erm.. Do you have a fortress as well where you stay?

"No… No, fortresses are for wars.. I stay in an orphanage.. But everyone was put to bed, so you don't have to worry about being caught."

"Wait! Who said that I was going with YOU?" I crossed my arms in disgust. "I should be in my own fortress with a robot that stays mostly out of my way! And with an incompetent computer!"

Zephyr stood there, puzzled.

I scowled back, reviewing my lack of resources. "Fine," I sighed, shaking my head.

It is not like I could ever get back to the Dib hyu-man's fortress in time anyway.. And wandering off on my own is not the wisest of decisions..

"I will go with you to your 'orphanage'.. But are you not supposed to be living with that female..? Amber, I believe? Is she at the orphanage as well?

"Who..? The orphanage is an 'all boys' residence."

All boys.. Only males.

"So.. I don't really know what you're talking about, but I'd rather be on our way."

"Oh.. Alright.. Lead our way, then."

Crashing, no ship, no computer, no Gir, Dib being more interested in vampires than ME, my lack of memory, Zephyr being.. well.. not his usual Zephyr-self.. A missing Amber hyu-man?

How much have I missed? And why?

"By the way.." he started again as I followed, "how did you know my name?"


	5. Crunching Echoes, Frightening Leaves ?

_Defective_

CHAPTER 5

"Drayne?"

"What?"

"Are we supposed to be out this far?" Dib shined his flashlight at the many 'Private Property' signs and strange trees that curled their hand-like branches.

His fingers were turning numb from the flashlight soaking up the frosty air.

He stayed as close to the other as possible without seeming.. well, awkward.

Fear was definitely creeping up on him. Creepy, dark woods had skills for playing mind tricks.

Or maybe he was just afraid of the state of his alien that was left under his demonic sister's care.

"No. We're trespassing, and there's probably a man on the back of THAT porch with a gun, ready to shoot anything he sees moving."

Dib shakily kept his flashlight off of the dusty, rundown house, completely convinced he would not sleep well once he returned home. IF he returned home.

"Well, we really SHOULD turn around, don't you think?"

"Why? You're not scared.. Are you?"

YES, he was! Bats screeching, owls hooting, the house creaking, the cold echoing..

Dib swallowed, staying beside him again, too frightened to lead or follow. "No?"

"Good," he smiled, an eye narrowing ever so slightly. "Because paranormal investigators can't be too afraid. If they were, they wouldn't be paranormal investigators in the first place."

Dib nodded, mentally scolding himself for getting into this kind of trouble all the time.

"Um.. I was actually asking because, y'know, my sister's still watching after the Irken."

Drayne only snickered to himself, seeming to not be listening.

Dib scowled through his fear, shining the light towards his new comrade. "And if my dad gets home from work early, I won't hear the end of leaving Gaz home alone."

"Relax. How often do you see your dad anyway? He's hardly home, you told me."

"Yeah, hardly home, but he DOES come home. Probably like four in the morning because I was up late trying to decode an EVP one night and I heard him come in.. Either him, or some stranger walked into our house, made coffee in our kitchen, then walked out again an hour later." A crunch under his boot caused a shiver to run up his spine.

He did not dare to look back in foolish paranoia, even though he swore that the breath on the back of his neck felt so real.

'It's only fear, Dib. There's nothing out in the woods.'

He gasped from the gunshots that reached his ears, a few howls from a wolf following.

"..Drayne," he whispered, his feet now rooted. "We should really turn back now.." He looked around at the tops of the rotting trees, gulping louder than he thought it would be. He could not shake the feeling of being watched by a predator, and the strange part was that even if he was afraid, he WANTED to see that lurking creature show it's face.

But his survival instincts were simply telling him to run.

"Drayne?" Dib turned around, looking for his companion, although he only met with the piercing air.

He glanced all around quite anxiously, eyeing each and every direction in hopes of spotting the other.

Dib felt his palm clench around the flashlight as the beam shook, the beads of sweat rolling down the back of his neck.

"DRAYNE?" he dared to shout, his throat clamping.

Once he was answered with another gunshot, he dashed.

Crunch, crich, crunch, crack..

He did not know which way he was running, whether it be further into the woods or back to the park, but all that was on his mind was his heartbeat.

He could only run, practically stumbling from the speed as the blood pumped through his ears.

Through his panting, it was hard to swallow his saliva without violently choking.

And as he continued on, fighting through the painful branches and thorns that he clumsily had run into, he limited his air, trying to keep as quiet as possible, though his boots caused an unnecessary amount of racket among the disturbed, decomposing leaves.

"DRAYNE!" he could barely scream, ending up tumbling forward and landing on his spine.

He then groaned, temporarily shocked from the impact against the roots.

Lifting his head shakily and rubbing his sore back, he slowly realized the absence of the metal that was supposed to be touching his nearly numb palm.

He stared at his empty right hand with only the moonlight helping him.

A ferocious howl echoed, chilling him to the bone as he found himself running again without even looking for his flashlight.

Snarls and steps of a heavy creature came from behind him, persuading his legs to push the limit.

* * *

"Why is that planet so close to yours?"

The vampire blinked out the window, his brow pinching. "That's the moon, not a planet."

"..Why is the MOON so close to your planet, then?"

"Well.." He shrugged, turning his head in my direction. "You ask too many questions, do you realize that?"

"So do you," I answered, tracing the moon with a gloved finger, poking each and every star.

"I do not. When was the last time I asked you anything?"

"Right now." I grinned at him, but he did not respond.

The smile slowly faded as I waited for any signs of irritation, anything at all..

My lips slipped into a frown before I glanced back out the window.

Hmph. He did not act much like the Dib hyu-man.. Who am I supposed to bother?!

"There's an extra bed.. You don't have to lay on the windowsill."

..Apparently this ledge was called a windowsill. "What do you mean by an 'extra bed'?"

"..A bed. No one's using it."

I watched him before glancing around the room to an extra of something..

All of the hyu-mans were lying down, unconscious with those fuzzy skin rectangles, much like the Dib hyu-man. Only these cushions were stacked on top of each other with a ladder connecting them.

"A bed?" I pointed to the empty cushion, receiving a nod from the vampire. "Why are those hyu-mans all unconscious on them?"

"They're sleeping, not- well.. I GUESS you can say that they're unconscious.. To answer your question from before, that is why we're whispering to not wake them up."

..I had asked that question.. erm.. a long time ago. Stupid vampire.. NO! Not really stupid, I am just scribbling my impatient nonsense, heh..

"But YOU are not on a bed. How could there be an extra?"

"That one IS mine. I just don't sleep."

"Ah.." WHY am I not connecting anything? WORK, YOU PATHETIC PAK! What do you think I am PROTECTING you for?!

I finally had managed to ask, "Do all vampires not sleep, then?"

"No.. I mean, I'm not really sure.. I've never asked another vampire before. Then again, I don't remember running into one."

Why would you RUN into one?

Heh.. Stupid. I am surprised I am even attempting to keep this conversation going, since.. well..

"Err.. Zephyr, what IS sleep?"

He mumbled something along the lines of 'too many questions' before carefully sitting beside me, examining the cold windowsill beneath him. "It's when someone rests and dreams, builds their strength back up.."

Alright, resting.. regaining energy. But 'dreams'?

"Dreams?" I repeated my thoughts, watching him shiver.

"Yes. O-Oh, Um.. Dreaming, well.." He squinted, looking back to the hyu-mans.

I tilted my head from the long pause and audible sounds of chattering teeth.

"Are you going to just SIT there and be cold or tell me?"

"I'm sorry, I don't know WHAT to tell you. I haven't slept in ages."

"Oh?" Yes, NOW I remember.. Erm.. He was supposed to be, ehm.. how old again?

"But why not? Have you not tried to do so?"

"Of course I tried!" he snapped immediately, but just as quickly frowned away, his head down. "But I'm.. I'm afraid of.."

As he watched the windowsill rather intensely, I started to wonder..

What did this windowsill ever do to HIM?

"I hope you are not expecting me to wait this long for an answer, because I will just assume that you REALLY despise this windows-"

"I'm afraid of the dark! There, I said it! I am AFRAID of the DARK."

"Heh..? ..I thought that you were only afraid of a tomato-processed condiment."

He then opened his eyes wider, a fierce glare replacing his previously distant look.

I scowled back slightly from the space between us growing smaller.

"How did you know that? And you never told me how you knew my name! What are you, some alien psychic?! Or are your alien friends spying on this planet?!"

"YOU said to whisper."

"Zephyr?" came a small voice from one of the beds.

We turned our heads to the smeet, who held a mangled, fluffy.. something with a body, face and ears.. Buttons for eyes?

Heh.. And I thought that 'I' was small..

"What is that?" he? asked quietly.

"Nothing. Go back to sleep."

I pursed my lips at the vampire, then back to the hyu-man. "I am NOT nothing!"

"Sh!" Zephyr pushed a finger in my direction. "Iris, it's fine. Sleep."

'Iris' watched for a few more moments, then nodded, lying back down.

"Ignore her. She's a light sleeper."

Light.. sleeper? Becoming light within sleeping? "She?"

"Yes."

"A female?"

"Yes.." he repeated, an eye squinting. "Oh.. yeah.. in an all-boy orphanage, um.. Well, a few of us found her on the street when she was really young, and we tried to register her in the orphanage for girls, but she apparently ran away, I think.. I don't know how a mortal baby is able to run during such a young age, but.. we kept her here. And I suppose she likes it here better, since she's still.. here."

"Ah.." I looked back to the smeet that had kept watching instead of shutting her eyes.

"The owner doesn't know," he continued, "if he did, he'd be furious. But it's been about six or so years now, and he hasn't found out yet."

This conversation suddenly turned into nothing but meaningless nonsense.. to me.

I looked away to the outside sky once again, content with the silence, though something seemed amiss.. And it was not Gir.

* * *

His breaths violently tore through his throat, his lungs in a war with his heartbeat.

He couldn't keep this up for much longer.. Not without a drink, at least. He hadn't brought any supplies.. besides a camera, but he hadn't planned on getting lost in the woods for hours, running from either a homicidal beast, or from a deadly case of paranoia.

He would much rather face the latter and have a heart attack than getting his head bitten off.

Once Dib felt woozy, his face met the roots and leaves, now only waiting for his last pant.

He thought of how life would be so different without him there to stop evil, until… he realized that everything would still continue on.. Everyone completely oblivious to the murder of the twelve-year-old who worked his knuckles raw to prove himself to his father.

Everything would still go on, as if he had never existed, with Gaz continuing on with her games, and his father..

He squeezed his eyes shut, not daring to finish the thoughts, although they still floated around aimlessly, just waiting to be written.

After a few minutes had passed, he lifted his head, uncovering his ears and craning his neck to see behind him.

…No hairy beast.

He looked to his front, adjusting the camera around his neck so it wasn't leaving anymore of a bruise against his chest.

No hairy beast..?

"Where did it go?" he asked aloud, picking himself up as he temporarily placed his internal battles to the side.

He turned around, even taking the risk to look up to the treetops again in case the creature had climbed to pounce from a better, more deadly angle.

But only the full moon met his stare, the one thing that he thought would never scare him.. But on this specific night, it DEFINITELY did.

He really did not believe in the moon being mystical, but his brain was recreating cliché plots of horror films that he occasionally watches to only find the faults in. Yes, they sort of frightened him still, but he kept in mind that they were only movies. And if that fact did not convince him, he had to watch 'Behind the Scenes' just to soothe his frightening imagination.

Usually, that failed even with all of his common sense on guard.. AND his doors locked, with his windows covered, and every dark corner containing a nightlight.

..Even if it was hard to sleep in a blinding room. The layout of his cozy, dark room was for a reason. To sleep PEACEFULLY without a single ray of light shining in.

Hm.. He's starting to sound much like a classic vampire in those films he watches.

He shook himself out of his thoughts, sitting against a decaying trunk, wrapping his arms around his chest as his organs struggled for warmth, which his trench coat could not provide at the moment.

He was definitely going to get hypothermia.. or SOME sort of sickness along those lines..

He breathed out hot air onto his palms, but the little warmth had already escaped, leaving him in a puff of steam.

He swallowed, finding his throat as cold as his fingers.

"..Have to get home," he coughed, sniffing and trying to motivate himself to continue on. "Have to call the police, report Drayne missing," he choked on the lack of air, getting back up after his self-pitying moment, squinting as he tried to peer beyond the many trees.

"BOO!"

Dib yelped, flipping head over heels back to the ground, which did not help his sore legs in the slightest.

He tossed himself back over to find the '70s-clad child above him laughing.

"That WASN'T funny!" he spat, recomposing his stance with a glare, dusting himself off and plucking the leaves that had planted themselves in his hair. "I THOUGHT that you were DEAD!"

"Well.. I'm not.. as you can see."

"That doesn't matter!" he fought, his freezing fingertips digging into his palms as his fists shook at his sides.

He couldn't tell whether he was quaking from the bitter cold anymore or just from the aching frustration.

"I've been running around these woods like an IDIOT freezing my butt off! WHY did you DITCH me?!"

"Hey, I didn't 'DITCH' you! I was following you, it's fine!"

"It is NOT. FINE. I was half SCARED to death! While YOU were ditching me, 'I' was running for my like from some hairy BEAST!"

"Hairy beast?" He looked up to the moon, cocking an eyebrow. "On a night like this? Did you happen to get any pictures?"

"Pictures?" he repeated, his face reflecting that of an 'Are you kidding me?' look, his tone confirming Drayne's suspicions. "You think that I had the TIME to take pictures of some WOLF thing that was CHASING me?!"

Drayne only scowled, his arms crossed. "It was a joke. Now do you want to just stand there and nag or do you want to go home?"

Dib held his tongue, so many more things left to say.. but seethed quietly instead as he followed after his retreating companion, ignoring the many more gunshots and screams.


	6. Breaking and Entering

_Defective_

CHAPTER 6

He had already fallen once, and he felt his legs starting to fail him again.

Drayne looked back to his friend in some form of sympathy, although he cracked a smile. "Cheer up, you're almost home! And we can always look for the vampire another day."

"I don't want to talk about it," he muttered, only wishing for a pain-relieving bath and a warm, comfortable bed with his alien beside him.

"That's fine," Drayne responded, just as quiet.

Once Dib reached his door, he twisted the knob and pushed, his body smacking up against it.

He groaned, trying to open it again, then banged his fist against the painted wood. "GAZ?" he called, peeking in through the window.

Drayne joined him, looking in to the dark living room. "Wow.. What time is it?"

"I don't know, my phone's in my backpack," he sighed.

"Is your sister a heavy sleeper?"

"No.. She's a light sleeper, actually. But she just ignores everyone anyway, so there's really no difference. Which means we won't be getting any help from her."

"Look who's using his brain, after practically collapsing from exhaustion? I couldn't do that."

Dib ignored him as he thought to himself, snapping his fingers as an idea sprang up.

Drayne followed as the other circled to the right side of the property and started to climb the closest tree with a struggle.

"Why are you climbing a tree?" he asked, an eyebrow slightly lifting. "Are you trying to get to the roof?"

"No! My window might be unlocked."

"And if it isn't?"

Dib pulled himself up, stumbling over the branch that had snapped beneath his boot. "Well," he managed, clinging to the next sturdy arm of the overgrown plant with his legs shuffling for a new surface. "I could always get the Irken to unlock it, then."

"..He couldn't just unlock your front door?"

Dib shot his hand out to grip the edge of the window. "Good point… but I'm already here anyway." He licked his chapped lips as he peered through the icy glass, his breath forming condensation both on the window and on his glasses.

With his legs shaking to keep themselves perched on the branch, he strived to gain leverage to open the window, finding his efforts useless.

"Did you open it?" his friend called from below.

Dib glared, glancing down to have a staring contest, but just then realized how far away from the ground he was. "N-NO! If I DID, I wouldn't still be- AHH!" His foot slipped right out from under him, the other following soon after.

Drayne quickly seized the other child in his arms, setting him down.

Dib only stared up at the other.

Wow… Gaz always let him fall.

"What?" his friend seemed to be defending his actions, closing in on himself with a slight scowl.

"Nothing.. I'm just not used to falling out of trees."

"Huh.. Well, you better get used to it from now on, because falling out of a tree isn't going to be your worst experience in life." He brushed off his hands with a swift clap, then placed his fists on his sides. "Anymore bright ideas?"

"Yeah," Dib copied him, his nails digging into his palms. "How about YOU think of an idea?"

Drayne stared for a short while, then shrugged. "Get a rock?"

"A rock..?" Dib looked down, snatching up one of the pebbles. "Why do you-"

"Too small."

He dropped it with a widened eye, searching for a much larger rock.

"Too big."

Dib growled to himself, swiping as many different-sized rocks as he could carry, then dropping them all at the other's feet. "THERE. PICK one."

"You don't have to be so grumpy," Drayne commented, sifting through the stones.

Dib mocked him in a low tone, turning his back to him. "What do you need a rock for anyway?"

He waited impatiently for the other's voice to respond, only receiving silence.

The pang of fear jolted through him of being left alone again, shifting his weight around on the heels of his boots.

"I-I said, 'What do you-?" He whipped around at the sound of shattering glass.

His jaw dropped as he spotted the gaping hole in one of the windows. "DRAYNE..!" he coughed out, unable to shake himself from the shock.

"What? Now we can get in."

While he was fishing for the lock, Dib was pacing, shivering once again. "OH, my dad's going to murder me!"

"THAT is when you call the police." He opened the window, climbing in.

"No, THAT'S when I'll be grounded for three months!"

"Relax!" he called from inside, unlocking the front door.

Dib twisted the knob, finally entering his home, only to gape again at the shards of glass scattered around his living room. "Relax? How could I RELAX knowing about this?!"

Drayne shrugged, picking up the heavy rock, tossing it every now and then as he surveyed the damage. "You can lie and say someone was playing around in the street with a ball."

"I can't lie to my dad like that, I'll feel guilty.."

Drayne threw the rock right back out the window. "Everyone feels guilty about something. Now go get your little alien friend and tell him to help me clean this mess up."

His shoulders slouched as he headed up the stairs, cringing every now and then at the sounds of shards of his window being moved around.

He just wanted to sleep…

"Irken?" he called quietly as he opened his door, glancing here and there for a sign of any intelligent life.

He flicked his light on, shielding his eyes as he searched.

..No alien.

"Great," he yawned, staring at his bed.

Drayne finished taping the hole, picking up the last glass shard, ready to beat a certain alien over the head for not helping.

Then again.. He always did everything himself anyways. Why stop now?

He locked the door, slipping the goggles off of his head and smirking to the rest of the unlocked windows.

* * *

"This disguise is rather obvious, is it not?"

The vampire grinned at his work, patting the wig. "Yes. It IS obvious. But like I said.. Mortals are stupid. They'll all just think that you have some disease or something."

"Disease..? Is the objective not to appear normal?"

"Oh, it is! Yes.. Well.. I can only do so much. And besides! A lot of mortals have diseases! Just.. not green skin! And boys do not usually wear dresses, um.. but.. you'll fit right in, don't worry!"

"I WILL worry!" I hissed, tugging on the wig and throwing it down to allow my antennae to breathe. "This THING limits my auditory AND sense of smell! …And it is uncomfortable," I added, crossing my arms as I glared to the lenses in the reflection. "..These hurt my eyes as well."

"Then maybe you should stop complaining and just get used to it. Besides, now you look less girly. I mean, not that there's anything wrong with that.. um.."

I bit my tongue, averting my fake eyes to him in the mirror. "How so?" I dared to ask, teeth grinding painfully together.

"It's.. your eyes. They're pink.. Like your dress."

"UNIFORM," I corrected, neatening out the wrinkles.

"Uniform, sorry.." he grumbled, looking down.

I then followed his gaze, blinking at the purple he wore on his limbs.

"What?"

"Hem?"

"What are you staring at?"

I poked his legs in the mirror. "Your limbs."

He picked up the black wig, placing it back on my head to which I protested a bit as he adjusted it. "Why?"

I ruffled the fake.. fur? with my antennae, turning my head side to side to fully examine the headpiece. "I like the color of them?"

"Oh.. Um.. thanks? I.." He quickly cleared his throat, turning so is cloak covered my view of the purple. "Well.. are you ready to leave?"

"That depends. If I have any questions about anything, will you be bothered if I ask?"

"A little..? It depends on the question you-"

"Do not use a word if I have just used it!"

Zephyr closed his mouth, revealing a slight scowl back to me in the mirror. 'I can say what I want,' he mouthed, opening the window.

I blinked, watching him start to climb out. "Why are you using the window?" I asked, peeking out beside him to the ground. "Should we not just use a door?"

"Do you want to be caught?"

"Eh?"

He sighed, mumbling a 'hold on', swinging his other leg over the windowsill and starting to inch down.

I followed, shutting the window and using my extra appendages, jumping down.

I waited with a victorious grin as he finally touched the ground.

"No! BAD." He smacked one of the legs with his cloak.

I glared, holding the metal from the sharp whip. "What?! Was I supposed to COPY you?!"

"Actually, YES. You were! Not everyone has THESE coming out of their back!" He shook another with a tight grip.

They retracted back, disappearing. "So?"

"SO, mortals are going to stare!"

"But I am already a different color!"

"I already SAID that your skin makes it look like you have a DISEASE. At least a disease isn't as abnormal as spider things coming out of your BACK."

"Well.. fine," I quietly answered, still glowering from the rough treatment. "I will not use them in PUBLIC. Now answer my question! Why did we use a window?"

"BECAUSE." He started to walk, gnawing on his lip. "If we used the door, the others would have found you and I would have gotten in trouble.. I always use the window anyways."

"..Why so?"

"You can't just walk out the door when you live at an orphanage. I'm still considered underage, so I'm not SUPPOSED to be out here on my own."

"..Has no one realized that you have been gone before, then?"

"No.. And that was not pretty.. The police were all over the streets, thinking that I was kidnapped."

"Kid..napped?"

"Stolen by someone."

"Ah.." I followed after the vampire, finding myself distracted by everything around us in curiosity.

A blue sky? Different-colored cars on the street.. hyu-mans walking around in a rush.. the shelters.. with fluffy tops.

..How could I ask what they are? Perhaps.. hmn.. Ah! Pointing? Pointing, like the Dib hyu-man had.. "What are those called?" I pointed to one of them, examining the.. the… small.. flat objects falling from their tops.

I waited for an answer, narrowing an eye from the lack of one. "Zephyr!"

He turned in a startle as I tugged at his cloak's collar. "What?"

"What are those things?" I tried again.

He followed my finger to the shelter, squinting. "A.. tree?"

I lowered my arm, walking along. "What is a tree?"

"It's.. a plant."

"What is a plant?"

"Something that grows from the ground."

"Ah.. And what is this?"

"A sidewalk."

"Is it a plant as well?"

"What? No! It's manmade."

"Manmade?"

"Yes."

"What is that?"

"It's.. We made it!"

"..Then.. Is that street a plant?"

"No.."

"Gyah.. But what is that?"

"Grass, Zim," he sighed.

"Manmade?"

"No! It's a plant!"

"Is your blue sky manmade?"

"No!"

"It showed space not so long ago. It must have been created by you hyu-mans, then!"

"NO! Can you just slow down with the questions?"

"Erm.. Why.. is.. the.."

"No, no, no! I mean, don't ask too many questions at once! You're tiring me out."

"Tired?"

"Yes, ask later. And we've been here, by the way."

"Hmn," I surveyed the area, watching the car speed by, nearly hitting a hyu-man.

But.. no one noticed?

"Does your robot really mean that much to you?"

I looked up to him from my observations, glaring. "No.. I do not even know him."

"Then why bother loo-"

"SILENCE, vampire! YOU can ask questions and I cannot?!"

"SH!" he waved his hands, smiling nervously up at the passerby who noticed the outburst. He lowered his tone, staying a bit closer. "Fine, I won't ask."

"Good," I murmured, then placed my hands on my side. "But if you MUST know, I feel responsible for what happens to my company-err, slave," I corrected myself, finding the vampire staring. "..WHAT?" I barked.

"Your tongue is strange.. and your teeth."

I covered my lips, hiding them behind my fingers. "Well, so are yours! Why are you even looking?!"

Zephyr shrugged, gnawing on his bottom lip again.

My eyes started to vibrate from the glare that I had held for so long at him.

I do not understand.. I used to be around him so often in the first version, but I had no reason to be..

"..What?"

"Your tongue and teeth are strange," I mocked, whipping around to continue on. "You are not as scary as the first time."

"Huh?"

"OH, nothing," I laughed, then realized why we were here again.

"Have you seen a robot? Perhaps torn apart?"

The tall hyu-man that I had spoken to only stared down at me before running away as far as possible across the park, then slowed down and walked once again.

I scowled, searching for another vict-err, informant.

"Wait!" Zephyr grabbed my arm, to which I practically snapped at, until he cut me o-

"I thought that you didn't want anyone finding out!"

"Oh, be CALM, vampire!" I ignored the hush from him, continuing with my head turned up. "I was just going to kill them after!"

"You can't just go around killing people who help you!"

"I did not SAY 'go around'! I would take them far away, then SECRETLY-"

"NO."

A disbelieving scoff left my throat after I had received a slap across my face.

I held the stinging side of my cheek, gawking at the other.

I had expected him to be menacing, holding up his stance, but what I did NOT expect was for him to be covering his mouth and crying.

My brain could not grip onto what had just happened, no matter how many drops dripped from his chin.

"Zephyr-"

"I'm sorry!" he apologized through his wavering tone, blubbering as the black drizzled under his eyes.

EUGH.. Him crying DID. NOT. look right.

I looked around to the hyu-mans watching from the disturbance. "I-I.. err.. Did I do something wrong?" I asked, not knowing how to help the strange situation.

"Are you blind?! I just hit you!" he forced out, apparently not caring about the eyes on him anymore.

"Then.. Why are YOU leaking?"

"I don't know, it was just.. sudden! And.. I didn't mean to! Why aren't you mad?! Be mad!"

"No.. I do not even understand why you hit me."

"Then.. Then don't understand! It's stupid anyway!"

I lightly skimmed the forming bruise, blinking down as I listened to the other talk to himself about redoing.. makeup? And something about rehydration.

I decided to ignore him and the wound then, scanning the area for any scraps on machinery along the road and sidewalk, dodging the tall, oblivious hyu-mans.

Heh.. It always seemed as if the tallest ones were the most foolish.

I looked back to check if the vampire was still following, finding him wiping at his eyes.

"Zephyr, there is no reason to be doing that! Pull yourself together, soldier! I demand that you do so!"

"But I hit-"

I slapped him across the face the same way he had hurt me, pursing my lips together. "THERE. You see? I am not crying over such a silly thing. Now do what you are SUPPOSED to do and help me look for Gir!"

Gyah.. Although Zephyr was not such a predator like the first time, he was still agitating.. Distracting, if you will.

He seemed to be going through a mix of strange emotions, one after the other, because his face was contorting as if he did not know whether to smile or not.

I stared hard at the expressions he portrayed, finding myself starting to try and copy some of them, then scoffed, turning back to continue on scouring.

Disgusting hyu-mans, stupid moody vampire, filthy PLANET!


	7. The Path to Eternal Happiness, Missing!

_Defective_

CHAPTER 7

"Hey, get up. You have skool in an hour."

"Five more minutes, Gaz," Dib grunted from the shaking, turning over and pulling the covers over his head.

Drayne's eyebrow arched as he puckered his lips. "I don't even sound remotely CLOSE to your sister." He watched as Dib tossed again, peeking out from underneath the covers.

It took him a while to stretch and blink his eyes wide, reaching for his glasses on the nightstand.

Once he felt nothing, he sat up, looking over the edge.

"What?"

"Where are my glasses? I always put them right there!"

"Check on your face," Drayne advised, stepping to the door. "And get ready for skool.. And your dad."

Dib's eyes snapped open then, ignoring the stuffiness as he ran around, getting his backpack together.

He brushed his into place with a few handfuls of gel, finally satisfied. But he did not feel well at all. His complexion in the mirror was even paler than he remembered.

He frowned, his hair copying with a droop.

* * *

"Dad?" he asked quietly as he snuck into the kitchen.

Membrane smacked the paper down with a smile revealed in his tone, "Good morning, son! How is my firstborn child doing? Finally had a breakthrough and have come to join me in REAL SCIENCE?"

"Um.. No.. I was, um.. going to ask if I could stay home today.. I really don't feel well.." He then flicked his line of sight to Drayne, who was leaning against the doorway with crossed arms. "And my legs are aching."

Drayne hid a snicker as Dib turned back to his father in hope.

"Son, you know very well that I don't allow that. Even when I was your age, I still attended skool even if I had the flu. WHICH I found the cure for that same day!" he stated proudly.

"But.. Dad, please! When have I ever asked you to stay home from skool?!"

"Hmn.." Membrane rubbed his collar-covered chin. "Well.. At least walk your sister to skool."

"So I can stay home?"

"Yes, I suppose, son of mine," he sighed, hiding his face behind the newspaper again.

"Good. You got what you wanted," Drayne smiled, lifting an eyebrow again. "But how will you explain the window?"

Dib held back a sneeze, closing an eye in doing so. "I'll just tell him what you told me to."

Drayne shrugged. "Fine. And what do you plan on doing all day?"

Dib headed to the stairs, yawning. "Sleeping."

"Oh.. I thought.. you know, with your alien and missing and all, you would be-"

"WHAT?!" Dib practically slipped down the stairs from stepping so quickly. "What do you MEAN 'he's missing'?!"

"I looked everywhere last night. He's not here."

"Gyah!" He grabbed a heavier coat, staring to pull on the second sleeve as his father stood in the kitchen doorway.

"Where are you going, son?"

"I, um.."

"You have to be home to walk your sister."

"But-!"

"Son, if you're well enough to run off now, then you can go to skool."

"Fine! I'll stay inside!" he snapped back at his father, looking to Drayne.

His friend nodded once, shutting the front door behind him with a salute.

"Where is your little friend going?"

"He's, um.. He wanted fresh air."

"Ah," he smiled once again behind the collar. "Well, I'll be off to work to save the Earth from stupidity! Don't forget your sister," he reminded sternly, leaving his son to pace around the living room in worry.

"I can't believe I let him slip right out from under me! How could he have escaped?! Not.. that I was holding him hostage or anything! I just-"

"You're talking," Gaz growled out from the back of her throat.

"Sorry," he answered somewhat half-heartedly, "but I'm just worried about him! Did you see him leave?"

"No. Now stop talking," she threatened, opening an eye to him as she slipped on her backpack, "because I don't want to listen to your stupid voice for twenty minutes straight."

"..Fine."

* * *

"Hey.. Why did we stop looking?"

I clutched at my uniform tightly, wrenching the fabric. "I cannot find him.."

"Oh, come on! It's only been, what, three hou-"

"EVEN with all of my 'superior' technology, I cannot find a JUNKPILE of a SIR unit!"

"Uh.." He scratched at his head, narrowing an eye. "What do you-"

"Gir! Gir, my SIR unit! I cannot find him!" I threw one of the small, smooth.. gyah.. "What is this?" I muttered quickly, holding up the object to him.

"A.. rock?"

Just before he was about to take it, assuming I was giving it to him, heh.. I threw it across the liquid, causing it to.. jump? Across for a few moments, then disappeared.

My antennae shifted under the wig as I reached for another, retreating from the other hand.

I turned my head to the vampire who had taken a seat beside me, waiting for him to say something, since.. his mouth was moving as if trying to form the right words.

I squinted, leaning near him. Perhaps he was whispering?

"Zephyr, if you wish to speak, then speak!"

"Oh.. um.. You didn't sleep last night.. Do you even need to?"

"No.." I looked down to his legs again, quickly flicking my eyes back up. "Well.. I am not certain if I do."

Why was 'I' not created with purple eyes?!

I clicked my tongue, glancing away in jealousy, but I could not help another glimpse or two. "Is that a wig on your head as well?"

"No.. it's real."

"A real wig..? There is such thing as a FAKE-?"

"No! This is hair! Real hair. See?" He tugged on it, to which he cringed a bit. "Real."

"Real.." I mumbled, then looked up to my wig, pointing. "Real?"

"No. Wigs are fake."

"How can it be? It is not imaginary."

"No.. it's not imaginary, right.. But.. it's-"

"Imitation of real hair. Which is the most ridiculous disguise I have ever seen."

I jumped up from the tall hyu-man, covering my wig.

Zephyr immediately hid behind me, peeking out.

"What have you been doing, going off on your own?! And with THIS fr…" Drayne blinked, his brow furrowing. "Wait a minute.." He attempted to get to the vampire, who only stayed out of his sight, no matter how many times they circled me, Drayne pursuing and Zephyr avoiding.

I squeezed my lips together to prevent the giggle from escaping.

Drayne finally huffed, shoving me to the side.

I held the abused arm, glaring as the demon stared at the other in fascination, and yet.. disbelief?

Zephyr eyes him cautiously, inching towards me, then froze from being blocked.

"..Those are interesting eyes," Drayne mumbled to him, adjusting the green collar to his shirt.

The vampire nervously closed in on himself, seeming to have a hard time trying to speak a response.. or even look up from the ground.

"What's the matter? Is your tongue caught on your 'FANGS'?" he mocked.

"Drayne," I hissed, smacking my lips together from the sour taste that the name had left behind. "Quit bothering HIM and take me back to the Dib hyu-man's base or I MIGHT just blow your little planet UP," I poked him on the forehead, wishing to my Tall-err, my.. self that I would be able to keep that finger.

Drayne scowled darkly, gripping my upper arm and tugging me after him, though he did glance back at Zephyr.

I grinned back at the vampire as well with a playful wave, my smile only growing with each pull.

Zephyr watched curiously, his eyes narrowing.

* * *

"You do not have to SHOUT at me," I seethed through my teeth as the child stepped back and forth.

"I WILL! I've been worried sick, LITERALLY SICK, about you being captured or dead, or whatever!"

"I already SAID that I was looking for my robot!"

"Of COURSE!" he spat, glaring everywhere but at me. "Because EVERYTHING is about your robot, isn't it?! How can an ALIEN be OBSESSED with a pile of junk?! HUH?"

"He is NOT a junkpile!" I defended, feeling my eyes shake in their sockets, trying my best to glare menacingly when the Dib shot one at me.

We held the challenge for quite a while, to which I sat straighter to hold my stance.

He ended up placing a hand on either side of my legs, his glower close.

I tucked my chin into my collar, my eyes darting from one furious pupil to the other.

"Dib, your sister's telling you to order- WHOA, what did I walk into?!" Drayne demanded.

Dib hurriedly stood upright, scrambling to adjust his collar and hair. "Um.. Nothing! I was just.. scolding him. What does she want, pizza?"

"No, salad."

"..Really?"

"I'm joking. Yes, pizza. You mind ordering two?"

"Two?"

"One for her, one for us?"

"Oh," Dib cleared his throat, fixing his collar again. "Irken," he addressed quietly, pointing to the stairs.

I watched his finger, then the staircase in confusion. "What?"

"My room."

"What about it?"

"Stay in my room!"

I scoffed, getting up. "I have been reduced from a universe to a hyu-man's little room!"

"What, do you have claustrophobia? Deal with it!"

"Eh?"

"Just go!" he ordered, grabbing the phone from Drayne.

* * *

My.. PATIENCE. Is wearing THIN.

I do not know how long I have been staring out this window.. Although.. Since I just arrived a few moments ago, it could not have been THAT long of a wait..

But SO WHAT if I 'escape'? There really is no risk.. Besides dealing with the angry hyu-mans. But if I WERE to leave.. Where could I go?

Staying at that orphanage was entirely too risky.. I do NOT want to get in trouble with the authorities..

Gyah.. I MIGHT just be stuck here.

"Zim!" a voice whispered from below.

I perked my head up from my palm, staring down at the vampire.

"Heh," I smirked as he looked around, then attempted to climb, but kept slipping.

Maybe help him? Maybe not..

"Zim!" He whispered a bit louder, "Can you help me up?"

"YOU want to enter the base of the hyu-mans that tried to hunt you down?" I asked sweetly. "Rather stupid on your behalf, no?"

He seemed to think about it for a while, but shrugged it off. "I can fight."

"Oh, really? I witnessed no such thing! I distinctly recall you hiding behind me."

"Well.. I just wasn't expecting anyone else! Now I will be!"

"Hmn." I tapped my fingers against my chin, pretending to think as I watched him still attempt to climb.

I smiled in amusement again, giggling rather evilly. "You are doing well! Now, if only you had strength to pull your heavy self UP."

"Shut up!" he yelled back.. I THINK playfully…

I watched him a bit more for entertainment, then called out, "Why not just use your cloak?"

"This is public, I can't-!"

"Public this, public that," I mocked. "Do you not ever take a chance, VAMPIRE?"

He blinked up at me, revealing a scowl. "Am I not taking one right now?"

"Mn.. Not good enough."

The ends of his cloak snapped up to the windowsill, his fingers following.

His face popped up then, causing me to jump a bit from the sudden movement.

"Move, or I'll squish you," he warned, his boot propped up beneath him.

I stuck my tongue out as I allowed him room, crossing my arms. "And what is the reason for you coming here?"

"I, um.. wanted to help you somehow."

"INSTEAD of hiding behind me?"

"Would you let that go?!" he barked, huffing. "I came here to help! You can at LEAST be thankful!"

"I will NOT be! There is no way for you to help me! Unless you could suddenly locate my ship, repair it, then find the rest of Gir! In which I am completely sure that you are not capable of doing!"

"..Fine.. Fine, maybe you're right. But at least I'm TRYING, unlike SOME aliens that are just sitting back, thinking that everything will come easily to them!"

"I am NOT thinking that!"

My antennae perked up from the sound of rushing footsteps. "Gyah!"

"What?!"

I glanced around in a panic, grabbing Zephyr and shoving him under the bed, ignoring his protests, bolting back towards the window just as the knob twisted.

The vampire glared out from beneath the bed, his eyes standing out as he watched the hyu-man enter suspiciously.

"Who are you talking to?" Dib asked, searching here and there.

I prevented my limbs from fidgeting, looking back to him. "Eh?"

"Who are you talking to?!" he repeated.

"You," I smirked, propping my chin up again.

"No, I mean BEFORE I came in here!"

"Oh.. heh, I was only talking to myself, like you do."

"I do not!" He peeked under the bed, which I cringed from.

The hyu-man stood again, turning his head back to me, then the rest of his body, his fists on his sides.

I mirrored him with a playful grin, feeling my brow crease. "…Well?" Run along, so I can continue to talk to myself.. alone," I cooed.

The hyu-man then narrowed his eyes. His evil, accusing eyes.. Gyah, I despise that expression.

"You're SERIOUSLY a bad liar."

"Am I?" I sincerely smiled, rather eerily, actually..

And it seemed to scare the Dib away as well, because he bolted back out the door.

I immediately checked under the bed in clear confusion, narrowing an eye. "Zephyr?" I mumbled, squinting through the darkness.

"Over here?" he called out.

I turned, glancing here and there, spotting only fingers clutching the windowsill.

"How did you..? Gyah.." I looked out, grabbing his arms to pull him up, flipping him over my shoulder.

He went tumbling, disappearing back under the bed.

I was about to scold him, though he popped out again, covered in..?

"What.. What is that all over you?!"

"What? AHHH! IS IT A BUG?! GET IT OFF, GET IT OFF!"

Though his screaming would give him away, his strange jumping and slapping at himself was entertaining.. until he yelled at me and came forward.

Whatever that was on him came off in puffs as he shook frantically.

I quickly stepped around him, cautiously keeping a safe distance between us. "A what? What is a 'bug'?!"

The door slammed open again, Drayne pointing what looked like.. I cannot even describe it! Circular..?

"FREEZE, vampire, and no one gets hurt!"

Zephyr paused, eyes still paranoid about the 'bug'. He then looked back at Drayne, immediately cackling.

Ooo, that sounds evil..

I giggled creepily myself, though I have no idea why he started to laugh.

"I said FREEZE!" he snapped.

"Ow!" Zephyr covered his eye. "Why'd you throw that at me?!"

"Some vampires are allergic to garlic!"

"Yeah, if you hit them in the eye!" Zephyr complained.

As Drayne attempted to seize him, Dib entered, his fists clenched.

"You lied to me!" he pointed. "You said there was no one else in here!"

"Well, yes. I did, because I knew that you hyu-mans were searching for him, so I hid him."

"What?! Irken, he's dangerous!"

"Irken?" Zephyr caught in the middle of his scuffle with Drayne.

"Just look at him! He has fangs! Vampires drink BLOOD!"

"Dangerous?! He has only tried to help me! Unlike YOU hyu-mans who keep me hidden in this room, and who threw that horribly-scented object at him!"

"I'm only trying to protect you! Our agreement was that I shelter you in return for Earth's safety! Remember?!"

"I asked you to shelter me, yes, but that vampire already proved to me that he is trustworthy. Now call if your demonic BEAST, or I call ON my armada!"

Drayne glared, caught off-guard apparently.

"Fine! Drayne leave him alone," Dib mumbled.

Zephyr hid behind me once again.. Typical of him.. as he brushed off the rest of the.. powder? from his hair.

"I'm not keeping that THING here, alien! I have enough to deal with already, including you!"

I slowly placed my hands on my hips, glowering. "Fine. Then consider me missing again, because I am leaving, without your shelter, and with a full-scale invasion at my disposal. Goodbye, now!" I waved, allowing Zephyr to jump out before me, my mechanical legs springing.

But just as I threw myself out after him, I gasped from the arms around my middle.

"Don't leave!" the hyu-man cried out from behind, clutch deepening to a death grip.

Tears fell from my chin one after the other.

"_YOU CAN'T GO!"_

_My eyes have never burned so fiercely.. The tears seemed endless._

_The cracked ground ferociously quaked beneath us as I crawled forward, making sure to protect my head as the bombs burst around me._

_She clung to me, trying to pull me back with both her strength and voice. _

"_ZIM!" her strange accent called. "IT'S SUICIDE! DON'T BE STUPID!"_

"_LET ME GO!" I snapped back, pushing forward._

_She managed to flip me over with surprising strength. _

_The slap to my face was half-expected, at least._

"_YOU CAN'T ALWAYS PLAY THE SAVIOR!"_

"_I WAS TRAINED FOR THIS!" I defended, "EVER SINCE I WAS HATCHED, I WAS TRAINED TO BE A SOLDIER! NOW RELEASE ME!" I fought, shoving her for her own safety, crawling further into enemy territory, explosions lighting up my way._

Tak..

Her insults meant that she cared. She tried to protect me..

My vision blurred time and time again as fresh tears presented themselves.

The hyu-man had pulled me back in, apparently wiping at my tears and at the streams that they left behind.

Drayne stood by, intrigued all the while, and.. with a look of hurt?

I looked to the hyu-man before me, lifting my gloved fingers to his chin, but not quite holding it.

He is crying? Why should he dry my sorrow and not his own?

I swallowed as he continued to speak about his loneliness and depression, his father and sister, skool and his lost mother, the grief he would feel if I left..

I do not remember this.. This did not happen in the first version.

My fingers curled before I stroked the fresh stream leading down his face.

Close contact is not as disgusting as I thought it would be..

The liquid kept from seeping through my gloves as I fingered the tears in curiosity, the other's four-fingered hand approaching mine.

"Don't go," he repeated, Tak's voice echoing, back to haunt me.

Zephyr managed to climb up again, various twigs poking out of his hair. The vampire was glaring.

"Zim!" he called.

I turned my head back to him, my thoughts consumed by bomb fire and motionless, mangled bodies scattered across the field.

_She stood there, a good distance away, her eyes wide with fear as a whistle drew closer and louder, the explosion separating us._

_She screamed in AGONY._

I jumped, the commotion of tears behind me as we hit the ground and ran.

"We can go back to the orphanage," he panted, already out of energy?

Pah.. Earth creatures. So weak.. Easy to crush.

I observed the vampire carefully as we slowed down once we had gotten far enough.

"I do not want to hide away."

"You have to! Besides, you would hate interaction anyway! Mortals make me want to punch them."

"If someone bothers me, perhaps I WILL punch them. What is wrong with that?"

"Well, since bullying goes under the radar, there's nothing wrong with punching."

"Radar?"

"It's a saying for something that goes unnoticed."

"Ah.." I filed away yet another piece of information, taking in the surroundings.

As I thought about our destination though, I growled.

Zephyr looked back at me, confusion taking place, but he brushed it off.

"Zephyr," I called to get his attention again, the anger dissolving. "Could you take me to 'skool' instead? It IS public, no?"

"Skool?" He wrenched his hands in one another, swallowing. "I'm.,. not sure if that's a.. good idea.."

"But I thought of it, so it MUST be! A VERY good idea, indeed. Skool is public, so I will not be hiding, I will learn of course, and I will be able to see-err, spy on the Dib hyu-man."

"..You mean that mortal with that.." He mimed having scythe-like hair.

I stared for a moment though, because I suddenly pictured Zephyr with the Dib hyu-man's hair and I screamed.

"What?!" the vampire frantically threw his arms around, searching his clothes in a panic.

"NOTHING!" I assured, though I still shuddered and twitched from the picture I formed. "Yes, him.."

Zephyr was on his guard now, still nervous about my outburst, apparently. "Spying is fine and all.. But Zim, skool doesn't teach you the right things anymore."

"But I never went! How could there be an 'anymore'?!"

"I MEAN skools nowadays teach children to just obey the system and not have individuality."

I glared away, biting my tongue. Sounds like something I know.. "And?"

"They're brainwashing everyone?"

"And?"

"I don't want you to be the same way!"

"And? What?! Vampire, I have already been brainwashed before. I am not going to let it happen again."

"Why before?" he asked.

I took the lead then, remembering to keep an eye on him.. Vampires pounce. Fangs.. Blood.. And that cloak.. What a powerful weapon, yet he does not use it.. I do not understand.

I then changed my course, starting to circle him.

He did the same, cautiously copying. "Why before?" he repeated. "What happened? ..Zim?"

"You have so much of an advantage over these creatures.. Why are you.. so.. quiet?" I mumbled, looking him over, ending with the squirming cloak.

"You didn't answer me," he tested.

"YOU did not answer ME," I matched the sing-song tone, seizing the cloak between my fingers, pulling and throwing the cloak around playfully.

He did nothing to stop me, though. "I'm not answering until YOU answer."

"HMPH." I slowed down my playing, simply caressing the fabric instead, admiring the silky texture. "My generation of Irkens is corrupted."

"There's that word again!"

"Eh?"

"Irken, Irkens.. What is that?"

"My race," I grumbled quickly. "And we are corrupted, twisted, defective if you will."

"What do you mean? Why?"

I wrapped myself with the cold cloak, looking down to observe the ends. "I was trained to be an emotionless death machine that knew no remorse or mercy." My eyes shifted to the side, catching the vampire in my peripheral vision. "My generation was trained like that since creation."

"..Do you.. feel remorse, then?

"Oh, I do.. Like I said, we are the defective generation.. We fought the authorities.. because my leaders wished to create the ultimate army to.." I looked forward again, straightening my uniform beneath the cloak.

The streetlights were the only sources of illumination. The sky was dark, but blank. The stars were hiding, leaving the work to the artificial beams, like the one above us.

"I THOUGHT it was to defeat enemies in war quicker, easier.. But we were sent out.. Some of us, anyway, into neutral territory.." I looked back at him again with a hidden smirk. "Are you intelligent enough to form a reason?"

"So you destroy, then the rest of them come in and conquer? Well that just makes you sound like a monster! Wouldn't that mean that you would turn on your race?"

"Most of us, yes.." A lie, a truth, a little lie to piece in..

"Then.. if you were sent here, then you're going to destroy the planet anyway?!"

I unwrapped myself, poking his nose. "NO, silly vampire. Because if I destroy your planet, my leaders will move in, contain me, and send me away too another planet, and the next MIGHT not be so peaceful."

"HOLD on, hold on! You're telling me that YOU'RE one of the merciless death machines, yet you're not killing?! What's the matter with you?!"

"And leave the questions at THAT, because I am tired of answering them!" I tapped my temple. "I, like the few of my race, have intelligence. I know my leaders' plans to use us, so I fight. I won't destroy the planet, but if someone gets me ANGRY.. My promises might slip."

"I see," he answered quietly, looking down as we continued to walk then.. well, march, in my case.

"Now tell me your story, vampire? Why do you not rule over this planet?"

"I don't know."

"You have the power to."

"I don't WANT to."

"Why so?" I marched beside him to observe him better, my antennae lifting from the whisper of his voice.

"Not everyone craves for power, Zim.. I guess you wouldn't understand because of your background."

"If I do not understand, then let me."

"..Fair enough.." A few breaths passed before he was able to start.

"Ruling is.. a big responsibility, and.. pressuring. I, being a vampire, would be.. well, someone would fight me.. They would seek out my weaknesses.. Ruling would just be too much trouble."

"You are fine with being a lonely, quiet vampire?"

"I'm NOT alone. You're here."

"Yes, but when I leave?"

"You wouldn't leave."

"You do not know me that well."

"You said that you were hiding here. You're not leaving in fear of being caught again."

I clapped once, twice, a few more times. "Good, so creatures of this planet can remember and form intelligent thoughts. Much easier than hideous rats that produce children just so they would not starve to death."

"Ew, what?"

"Oh, nothing. Bad memories. Blorch."

He was still utterly confused, but he would remain like that. "Alright, so you're not alone. How does that help you?"

"Well.. You're an alien.. And I've felt like one.. So now I don't feel like the only one anymore."

I nodded. "But you cannot be the only creature of your race."

"I sure feel like it. I've never seen one in my life."

"Perhaps look in a mirror?"

"I mean ANOTHER vampire. But then again, if there was another, we would fight."

"Why so?"

"Territory."

"Ah.. It makes sense, yet does.. not. Why fight when you can work together?"

He shrugged. "Vampires are vicious."

"I have not yet seen one that is vicious."

"Likewise for an Irken death machine."

"I TOLD you only when I am angry."

"And the SAME. I am vicious when I get angry ALSO."

"Then I hope to never see you angry."

"Likewise."

* * *

"Why haven't you been going to skool?" she demanded.

Dib groaned from his sister's constant rage. "I've been sick, Gaz. I was out in the woods for too long, remember?"

"You're not sick. You're just upset about that alien ditching you. Get UP and go to skool, or Dad's going to be mad at you."

"No, he won't. He never knows when I stay home because he doesn't care."

Gaz kept her fingers clenched around the doorknob, her backpack over her shoulders, ready to leave.

"Gaz, I'm not going to skool today. Ask Drayne to walk you." He covered his head with the Mysterious Mysteries blanket again, wishing to return to the dream realm where he was most at peace.

"You better STOP being depressed, Dib, or I'll cut off your limbs one by one and cook them in a pot of-"

"Yeah, yeah, I get it. Just leave me alone, would ya'?!" he snapped.

Gaz opened an eye suspiciously from her brother's behavior, waiting a few moments for a quick apology, but none followed.

She shut the door with a small growl, gritting her teeth.

* * *

Drayne waited by the door, umbrella in hand. "Is he coming down today?"

With no answer, she stepped out the front door, stomping down the sidewalk.

"I'm guessing that's a 'no'." He followed after her, swinging the umbrella.


	8. I Lead, I Follow Not

_Defective_

CHAPTER 8

Dib was scowling up at his ceiling, sticking his tongue out at the many glow-in-the-dark planets, stars and UFOs that mocked him.

The late morning light was sneaking its way through the blinds, attempting to wake even the darkest corners of the Earth, that being his room.¬¬¬¬

He did not want to get up. He did not want to eat, he did not want to shower, he just wished to lay in bed and sulk in his misfortunes.. which did not relieve the stress one bit.

He swallowed hard, blinking the tears from his eyes, allowing them to drizzle down his temples and past his ears.

After a while, when he thought he had stopped crying from feeling the dry trails, fresh, searing drops unsheathed themselves.

Inner conflicts were tough to snap out of. He had seen many therapists in the past couple of years, being forced to, of course, by 'concerned teachers'. The teachers thought of him as a disturbed outcast. The therapists deemed him crazy for believing in the paranormal because they only saw from a scientific point of view like his father. They all deemed him insane, and when he had refused to take anti-depressants, they threw him out of the hospital.. His father did not even know that his son was there. Whenever the doctors tried to contact him, or Dib had tried to call him, a privilege all of the children had each day with a maximum of fifteen minutes for each phone call, his father never answered.

The fear of his father ignoring and abandoning him tore him apart. He figured the skool had told Membrane where he was. But apparently no communication had been shared, and two months in the hospital had passed without his father knowing. He could have been missing for years, and his ignorant father would have never known.

Dib clenched his teeth at the twisted thoughts of such probable things that could have happened.

Now he wished for the world to end, an alien invasion to take place. Such a homicide would at least play a part of justice for him.

Everyone would realize that they were naïve, and apologize for bullying him about the paranormal with their last, dying breaths. Such a wish was cruel, he knew, but seemed like the only option for him to possibly be happy again.

* * *

Screams of agony, flesh ripping away, SKELETONS HANGING ON-

I jumped awake, my breaths hammering my insides.

My dreams are killing me..

The vampire shook a bit, the cloak wrapping around tighter.

I did not mind at all, since his body was cold and comforting.

I checked my neck, relieved to find no bite marks. I sighed in contentment, shifting closer to wrap my arms around the icy creature, settling my cheek on his shoulder, my antennae nestling in his hair of blood.

I noted that he was awake, yet relaxed, unlike his usual self.

"Zim," he whispered, shifting slightly. "I've been thinking about this place.. I know you don't like it."

"Mn."

"But where else could we go?"

"I could build a fortress of my own. It could not be that hard."

"You mean a house?"

"A base," I corrected. "But I would have to fetch my machinery.. Most of it was stolen from my Pak."

"Which is.."

"Yes, this. And I believe that the Dib stole it for me.. Which means we have to go back."

"Oh.."

Although I have already made plans and I always spring up to pursue them, I remained still, along with the vampire.

It was clear that neither of us wished to move from the comfort that we provided for each other.

"…In a little while, then?"

He nodded, burying his head back against my uniform and letting out a calm breath.

* * *

It was around one in the afternoon as Dib was in deep slumber, finally able to avoid his distressing thoughts. He did not break out in a cold sweat, he did not twitch awake, he did not scream and fall off of his bed. He stayed asleep, lost in a peaceful dreamland where aliens were captured, vampires were vanquished, and he was recognized for his struggles.

Only then did he shift from the clanging and crashing, a moan rising deep within his throat from disagreeing with the disturbances.

After another few bangs, he sat up, alert and ready for the intruder downstairs.

He snuck down the stairs with a baseball bat in hand, his back keeping against the wall as he looked over the railing.

The noises were still muffled, if only slightly.

His eyes stuck to the doorway to his basement, which was redecorated to be a laboratory for his father, although still in the making. The tile was never finished because the representatives of the company that were working on it made a snide remark about Membrane's ideas, which set off the scientist.

He kicked them out literally, was sued, but won the case from popularity (a flaw in the court). He said he would finish the floor himself, yet he never seemed to have time to complete such a task.

Even with the unfinished tile, equipment had still been placed and anchored down. Perhaps Membrane had forgotten about it…

He snapped from his thoughts at the sound of glass beakers falling to their death.

Dib immediately ran down the lab stairs, defenses up. "I CALLED THE POLICE!" he cried, his hands shaky.

The vampire and I froze in our tracks.

Zephyr looked to him, then to me, barely moving his lips as he murmured harshly through his teeth, "I thought you said that he would be at skool!"

"He should have been!" I defended, not keeping up the sneaky act that he held on to. "And what kind of whispering is that?!" I insulted, turning back to the Dib hyu-man. "And why are you here?"

"Why am 'I' here?! Why are YOU here?! This is MY basement!"

"To steal the components of my Pak, obviously."

"OH, why don't you just give away your weaknesses TOO, while you're at it?!" the vampire snapped.

"While I am at what? You make no sense! Why would I do that?!"

Dib came forth with the bat, the handle tight between his palms. "Don't yell at him!" He swung.

Zephyr dodged, although taken back, stumbling and falling, beakers pouring down on him, shattering.

Just as the hyu-man was about to hit the vampire as he was down, I grabbed the bat, keeping a secure clutch on the tip.

Dib's eyes shot wide from the reluctance of the bat to swing, looking back.

I stared at him, then at the knocked out creature full of glass.

I then full-on glared, aiming the rage at the hyu-man. "How dare you," I hissed, yanking on the bat, yet he held on.

We battled over the weapon, spinning in a frenzy to gain control over the other.

He let go however, and I immediately released it as well, my extensions unsheathing.

He placed some space between us, cautiously covering his head.

I loomed over him without even thinking, but I stopped myself from harming the creature, though I desperately wished to dig my claws into tearing flesh.

Instead, I fled to Zephyr, picking him up swiftly, the fragments falling and crunching beneath my mechanical legs. "Give me the rest of my pieces and I will leave."

"But I don't want you to leave!" he mentioned hurriedly, swallowing once he realized he had said it.

I tilted my head to the side, perking an antenna.

"I mean, you're the only good thing that's ever happened to me! You HAVE to stay! …Please?"

I watched him carefully, dangerously. "No. Now return my pieces."

He blinked, then scowled back, a hand reaching out to the machinery beside him, popping a compartment within the metal.

I immediately lunged to snatch away the remaining device, though he pulled it from my grasp just in time.

"Then at least tell me where you two are going!"

I grabbed my belongings anyhow, the glass shards still falling from the body in my arms. "I am not certain yet.. But you will see me again, so quit your reluctance for me to leave!"

"Well, sorry! One step out the door could mean the end for YOU. I'm only trying to help!"

I skittered up the stairs, metal clinking against metal.

"Wait!" he called after me.

I heard the rushing thumps up the stairs just as I stopped in the front doorway.

Although the child's constant demanding was irritating, I stayed for just a little while longer as he caught up.

"When do I see you again? Will you come here?"

"I will be anywhere! And the next time you steal from an Irken Invader, I will have your insides on a platter."

He made a quite disgusted face.

I eventually understood, then sent an equally horrified face back. "Not for me! I would never even consider that! Wretched child! But see you soon, anyhow."

"Wait!" he repeated, which did not settle with my antennae because I ignored him and kept going.

He stood there at the end of his sidewalk, the security lasers buzzing, being the only sound.

..Other then a few screams here and there in one direction, the usual sirens in the far off distance.

* * *

I shook the vampire every now and then as I worked on the schematics, itching at my wig. "Zephyr!" I called, shoving him.

He only fell to his other side like a lifeless.. robot.

I was not so much giving up on the vampire, but I was too occupied with the layout than to keep trying to awaken the creature.

Perhaps he was dead?

I looked to his face, seeing his eyelids twitch and shift.

"Hmn.." I brushed some glass out of his hair, then stood, finishing the design.

I have already found the PERFECT place for the fortress, fitting in-between two buildings at the end of a road.

But it is not the BEST spot possible, however, since the colors may draw too much attention.. But that does not really matter, really.

Just as I released the machine into the planet to dig, the vampire groaned from behind.

"Where am I?" he asked in a daze, his palm on his head.

The ground shook beneath us, alarms sounding and lights flashing.

I ran back, grabbing the vampire and pulling him down, encasing us in my shield.

The pebbles beneath our legs wobbled, the noises muffles.

Though, I could hear his ragged breathing.

"Zim," his voice cracked, "you know I don't like the dark."

"We are only hiding," I assured him, listening for the metallic construction. "And there is nothing to fear, anyhow. It is only us."

"YES, but there are bugs!"

I am not certain why he was whispering.. It is hard enough to hear with all of the annoyances on the outside of the shell.

"What do you mean? What are 'bugs'!?"

"They're little creatures that crawl," he paused to shudder, "and will do anything to survive.. which means EAT anything!"

"..But.. what does that have to do with- AH.. I understand! Well, just be careful, that is all!"

"I HAVE been careful!"

"And?"

"I'm still alive!"

"CORRECTION, you are still here. Not alive."

"Shut up," he hissed.

Murmuring reached my antennae.. and footsteps.

I released us from the shield, the light stinging my eyes, but I progressed anyhow, shifting my wig around to perfect it.

Zephyr followed, weeding in and out of the people who were curious enough to come out of hiding.

"There is nothing to see!" I yelled, reaching the newly-built fence and turning to face the creatures, whose heights were extremely too tall for my comfort level.

Zephyr kept his head down as if.. ashamed? Why so?

The hyu-mans had begun to clear out, leaving us to an open door.

"Why are you hanging your head?" I asked, taking a step up to the door and waiting.

He walked after me, still with unsure composure. "I'm not really a people-person."

"..Eh?"

"I'm not outgoing!"

"…Eh?"

"I'm shy, Zim! I'm not good around strangers! I'm an introvert.."

"Then WE are opposites, vampire. I enjoy speaking to others. But not so much listening." I smiled, tilting my head. "SO, because this is my new fortress, I will no longer require your shelter of unwanted children."

"Zim, that's offensive! We're NOT unwanted! .. Adults just.. already have children."

I shrugged it off. "Unwanted. From what I have witnessed, parents only bring down their children."

"Where did you see that?!"

"..Nevermind.." My hand reached the doorknob, twisting it.

"Welcome HOME, son," voices greeted, tall robots stretching over my height.

Zephyr jumped behind me, startled by the other moving creatures. "What are those?!" he squeaked.

I cackled from the vampire's constant fear, shaking my head. "Enough worrying! These are my new parental units to keep up appearances, of course. You do not have to be afraid of them."

"I didn't say I was afraid!"

"You sure sounded like so!" I stepped inside, the robots moving out of the way.

"INTRUDER ALERT."

I blinked from the strange voice of the computer. "I do not remember programming it to sound like that.."

The next thing I realized was wires thrashing out at the vampire from the ceiling.

Zephyr yelled back at the restraints, crying out to me.

"Computer," I called out at the top of my voice, a little too softly for my taste. "The vampire is safe. Scan him and leave him alone."

"Sorry," it grumbled.

"That is fine," I assured, placing my fists on his hips as the creature was dropped back to the ground.

"If I'm going to be thrown around like this, then I don't want to stay here!"

"That should be the last time, vampire."

He stayed as close to me as possible, paranoid about the ceiling. "'SHOULD' be?"

"Well.. you never know if a little virus hacks into the system."

"Zim.. this is serious! I can't be in danger like that, my skin is too delicate for-"

"Do not worry, bloodthirsty creature!" I stepped to the doorway, observing the kitchen interior. "Should such an event ever happen, I would risk my life to save your 'delicate skin'. How does that sound?"

"Romantic?"

"Hem.. It was SUPPOSED to be mocking."

"Mhm."

"It was!"

"I didn't say it wasn't."

I scoffed at the attitude, crossing my arms. "Very well, vampire. I have work to attend to, so YOU may explore."

"…Explore? There are only two rooms."

"Oh, but that is what you ASSUME! COMPUTER!"

"There are currently three-hundred and forty two rooms in check."

Zephyr's jaw dropped, his cloak going limp. "How could you fit THAT many rooms in this small house? What, is it some sort of alien technology?"

"No," I laughed, "that is my Pak. This base is not just ground level like YOUR silly fortresses. Now go!"

"But what if I get lost?!"

"Ask the computer!" I shut the door behind me, marching off.

Gyah.. I must be an IDIOT for leaving a vampire with my technology.. AND for wandering off alone..

But I have nothing to worry about, since I am equipped with everything I need to practically be invincible.. To be a death machine..

I licked my lips at the destruction weaving through my thoughts.

Oh, the sweet scents of burning planets.. And the way they break and crunch and light up.. They drift and give others a chance to witness meteor showers. But oh, how bright they become! Nearly as bring as the star above.. Perhaps this one is a planet that is slowly reaching its peak to annihilation..

I blinked away from the bright light, blotches clouding my vision.

Gyah..! Curse my attraction to light! Why do I even do that?! Stupid eyes.. And they are not even purple!

Once I was able to focus, I shook my head, then continued on, observing the civilization around me.

Very small hyu-mans playing, alone. Almost hit by a vehicle.. crying.. No one was coming to comfort them..

..Not surprising.

Am I the only one who even cares? The smeets should be watched over, the vehicle should have seen them, and there should have been adults to accompany the crying younglings.

The Dib's father should be spending more time with his children.

I shook my head, growling. Perhaps I AM defective after all. The thoughts seem to be right, yet no one else seems to think this way!

Oh, my thoughts are utterly scrambled. Forget what I was writing, even though you could go back and read it over and over. How dare this pen betray me..

I looked up to the skool that lifted itself over the horizon.

I focused closely, observing the children running around outside, throwing.. circles? at each other.

Others sat alone off to the side.

There was also a.. training gym?

OH, that adult looks scary.. A whistle?

I covered my head in panic, feeling my eyes shake beneath my lids.

..But no explosion.

I scowled from the cruel trickery, glaring at the adult with the panic-inducing weapon around her? neck.

I sprinted then across the property and streets, reaching my destination as another whistle blew.

I ducked beneath the fence, hiding behind a few oblivious children.

"Filthy hyu-man," I hissed as she yelled at some others, who started to run in place.

"What are YOU doing here?"

I looked up to the purple-haired child, narrowing my gaze as the hyu-mans who covered me glanced at her and moved away in fear.

"Where is your brother?" I asked, seeking him out.

"He's not here," Gaz mumbled. "And why did you leave? He didn't talk to me as much."

"I do not enjoy spending my precious time under the shelter of a hyu-man."

"Then where did you go?"

"Not too far from here." I looked back to my previous path. "..In that general direction.. somewhere."

"Zim," she addressed, regaining my attention again with a flick to my head. "Cheer up my brother, or I scoop out your insides and tie them around your THROAT."

I stared, slowly closing my mouth. "I never told you my name."

"Did you even hear what I said?!"

"YES, contain your anger, child!"

"HEY!"

I jumped away from the fence in fear from the sudden shout this way, staring at the wide, tall hyu-man that approached the other side.

The teeth that grew into tusks were grotesque.. even for a hyu-man.. if this thing WAS hyu-man.

"Get back on this side! I'll call the police if you try to ditch skool!"

I stared up at the creature, then glanced to my sides. "..You are not speaking to ME, are you?"

"YES, you, hideous kid! Now get BACK on this side!"

"OH, you wretched beast!" I snapped back, climbing over the fence to attack, pulling out my starlight-powered laser.

"OOPS," sang another tall adult, glasses glimmering. He snatched up my weapon with a careful smile. "I'm sorry, little one, but there are no toys like this allowed on skool grounds. It's considered a danger, and we can't have a lockdown now, can we?"

I blinked up at the overly-happy hyu-man, my brow furrowing. "..Eh?"

"Oh, I'm sorry, I'm Mister Elliot, by the way! Now run along, just follow the other kids, okay? You'll be placed in Miss Bitters' class when we get back to learning. Oh, you're gonna LOVE it!" he smiled, now observing my laser as he spoke with the other adult.

"Hey, aren't you supposed to be gone?"

I bit back the string of insults that would have gladly materialized, turning my head to Drayne. "NO, I am still here!"

"Why?"

I cautiously sidestepped to him, ready for any attack that a demon may issue. "I was looking for the Dib hyu-man, but apparently I am stuck here?"

"Well, this is skool. Kids have to stay here until it's over." He leaned against the fence, crossing his arms. "Dib's not here."

"I was notified."

"Alright.. So.. I wanted to ask.. Your name is Zim?"

"Your name is Drayne?" I mocked, coming closer.

"HA, ha! What are you doing here?"

"I already told you-"

"I MEAN why are you here, on Earth?"

"Ah.. For a mission, do not worry about it," I waved him off, prepared to retrieve my weapon.

"HOLD up," he grabbed my arm, pulling me back against the fence.

Oh, that did not sound pleasant against my Pak..

"What?!" I demanded, attempting to shove his arms away.

"You expect ME to not worry about a 'mission' that a destructive alien is on? While on MY planet?"

"YOUR planet?"

"Yes, MY planet!"

"Destructive, how?"

"You tired to attack the gym teacher? With a GUN?"

"Whatever this 'GUN' means, that does not mean that I am destructive," I laughed off the assumption, immediately frowning from the look I was given. "Well.. Fine! But that 'gym teacher' insulted me!"

"We're ALL insulted here. Kids are called the mindless zombies of the future. Get used to it."

"..Zombies?"

"Yeah."

"..And.. what are these?"

"Green, destructive things that lack a brain."

"Oh.."

"Which sounds familiar, doesn't it?" he asked.

I widened an eye. "No.. not really."

"Hm. Think about it, then."

"Then.. While I am thinking about it.. Tell me about your sister?"

"..Excuse me?"

"Aphrodite, was her name? Tell me about her? I was curious, since you seemed to blame me about her death and all in the last version, but I still do not understand."

He stared in… horror, which was not very fitting on the face of Drayne.

"Why are you looking at me like-! OH... I apologize, that did not happen here.."

"What do you mean? Are you psychic or something?!"

"WELL, technically not because I am making you say this with a pen."

"What does that even mean?! Who are you?!"

Ignoring the stares around from the other children because of the commotion Drayne was creating, I burst out laughing from the out-of-character emotions of the demon. "Do I scare you, demon?" I giggled, making a sudden movement, which actually made him recoil. "Oh," I smiled mischievously, tipping my head down. "Why would you be afraid of such a small alien? You are as tall as the skool!"

He looked back at the building. "I am not! I'm just a little taller than you!"

"In your disguise."

"YES, in my- WHAT?! NO! I'm not a demon!"

"But you are countering your behavior. I already know, Drayne," I clicked my tongue from the taste. "Heh.. is it not ironic that your name starts with a 'D'? Like the Dib hyu-man? And Zephyr, like Zim.. Then again, I planned it that way. It was amusing to name characters as such."

He squinted, attempting to follow. "Huh?"

"I do not understand either! If I have created such a character, why do I not know exactly what your past is? And your future? And I did not know where the Dib was, yet I DID through my own writing.. Gyah! Too confusing!"

"What..? What?! YOU'RE confusing ME! Tell me what you're talking about!"

"Oh, this will drive me mad," I ignored him, "but.. if I am the one writing.. then I could just.." And evil grin tore itself through my lips as I dreamed? of what could happen.

Drayne remained confused, his arms crossed. "Writing..?"

"SILENCE! I am ranting to the audience, demon!" I snapped, waving off the stares from all around. "I could always just end this the way I want it to.. Why did I not just do that before? What went wrong last time?!" I whispered harshly, glaring. "BUT, I am a step ahead anyhow.. or.. am I?" I paced back and forth, scowling at the disguised demon, continuing, "The vampire was never in an orphanage, yet he was this time. A minor difference, of course. Yet, I do not remember crashing twice.. And I have two memories, somewhat.. One of the last tale, and one of this? OH, confusion! I must test my memory! DEMON!"

"Stop calling me that!"

"FINE. 'HYU-MAN', you have come from 'Cape May', have you not?"

"Yeah.. Why?"

"To do what?"

"..Catch a vampire."

"Are you sure? Not to catch me?"

"I'm sure."

"Certain?"

"Yes, certain!"

"Are you positive?"

"Completely positive! What is this all about?! What were you even talking about?! What were you saying before?!"

"That is none of your concern!"

"It IS, if you're asking me questions!"

I blinked a few times, imitating his stance. "I do not think that we have ever talked for this long before. This does not feel right.."

"Heh.. I did not.. make you say that," I smiled nervously, attempting to keep the corners of my mouth high.

"Of course you didn't! You're delusional or something, because no one controls me but myself! And there WAS NO LAST TIME. You sound like you're rewriting something."

I narrowed an eye, holding back a giggle. "I am."

"NO. You're not. You're standing RIGHT in from of me, without a pencil."

I frowned, my brow furrowing. "I have a pen, actually."

"No, you DON'T. Look at your hands! No pen!"

I followed the instruction, glancing down at my empty palms.

"See?"

"..Heh.." I chuckled at the unknowing demon, smiling. "Fine, I will play along."

He shook his head, rolling his eyes. "I can't believe you."

"HEY," Gaz hissed, shoving Drayne to the side.

I giggled at the misfortune, but gasped from the punch.

I did not write that!

"I SAID to cheer up my brother!"

"But I was told to stay here, or I would get in trouble with the authorities."

"No, you won't. You don't even go to skool here. They can't track you until you register."

"Track me? Cannot? Heh, then see you!" I waved, about to hop the fence, but turned back to scan the area, hunting down the energetic hyu-man.

I dodged the children every now and then, shoving my way to the teacher with a glare, snatching my weapon back.

"Oh!" he cried in surprised. "You can't that until your parents-"

I stuck my tongue out at him before dashing back into the crowd, jumping the fence.

Well, there was commotion behind me.. but did I care?

* * *

The Dib hyu-man.. seemed to be dead?

I stared at his unmoving body beneath the covers through the glass, pressing my face against it as I listened closely.

Still no movement. Not talking? He usually talks to himself.. Depressed? Depression = Sleep?

I scratched at my antennae in confusion before quietly opening the window. "Dib-"

"AGH!" he yelped, the pillow smacking me.

I scowled at the attack, my antennae drooping as I rubbed at my face. "What was that?!" I snapped.

"Jeez, sorry! You scared me! And what are you even doing here?! I thought you LEFT."

"I DID," I confirmed, tilting my head. "But you sister requested me to.. cheer you up."

"Requested?"

"Well, ordered. In a most frightening way. But I figured that I wanted to visit you anyhow.. Because I found where I can stay."

He was currently watching me with his glasses suddenly on.

I carefully climbed down from the windowsill, keeping an eye on him. "So I thought that you would want to know, just to assure you that I have not gone far away."

"Where?!" he demanded, shooting up from the sitting position, running.

I threw the pillow in panic, covering my head as the hyu-man's hands grabbed at me.

"Where did you go?!" he shook me violently.

"I was planning to let you know!" I managed, waiting for the world to cease spinning before motioning him to follow. "I can show-"

"No! Use the window. My dad's home."

"Ah.. Why.. does that matter?"

"He'd kill me if I walked out the door now. I told him I wasn't feeling well again." The Dib hyu-man jumped up to the windowsill.

"Are you?" I asked, extending the arms.

"I'm fine now." He jumped, to which I shouted in worry. Worry? As I dove after him, securing his landing.

"Thanks, but I can take care of myself, alien."

I released him, uncomfortably leading him from his property.

For all of the trouble that the hyu-man had cost me, for all of the pain that he inflicted!

I cannot remember any of it? Strange.. Am I really delusional?

I glanced back at him quickly, blinking away. "Dib hyu-man-"

"Dib hyu-man," he mocked. "Can't you just say my name already with a nickname attached to it?! And that wig is really bothering me."

"Why are you so.. irritated?" I asked quietly, actually afraid of him at the moment.

"I'm just.. thinking about my dad. Forget about it."

"Well, if such things are causing you to be angry with me, then would you care to explain what is wrong?"

"I'm NOT angry with you. And I want to tell you, but I think I said too much already. You're a bloodthirsty alien who doesn't even care."

"Then why would I ask?"

"To try and use my weaknesses against me, of course."

"Hmn.. Maybe so. But why would I go through all of that trouble?"

"Because you're bloodthirsty, I said!"

"I do not drink blood!"

"That's not what it mea-"

"Silly hyu-man, I am the one who wrote the word. It was only a little joke. I am obviously not a vampire. OR AM I?" I hissed playfully.

"Wrote?"

Gyah.. I keep forgetting to stop saying that.. Am I just backing myself into a corner?

"..Eh.." I twiddled with my fingers, smiling with a shrug. "Nothing?"

"Huh."

He supposedly let his suspicions go, and his want to speak altogether. I actually wish for him to speak, but I do not want him snapping at me..

Ah.. well, I will save that conversation for later… conversation?

Not a fight?

Since when did I wish for normal conversations with the Dib?

And a scarier question.. Why am I voluntarily leading my mortal enemy to my base?!


	9. Demons Stalk Me?

_Defective_

CHAPTER 9

Zephyr kept his head covered beneath his arms, biting back the indescribable urge to drink. He cannot even remember the last time he fed, be it such a long time ago.. could he somehow ask for the alien's help?

I peeked in, narrowing my eyes. "Having trouble trying to think? That is an issue of many hyu-mans today. If not, always."

"No," he murmured. "My head just hurts."

"Ah, then.. I suppose the Dib hyu-man could not change that, because he is quite irritating."

"Hey!" Dib snapped, from behind.

"I am only joking! ..Maybe."

He glared, his arms crossed.

I did allow him in, however, earning a hiss from the vampire.

Zephyr snapped his fangs at the child. "He knocked me out and he's allowed to be here?!"

"Yes," I nodded, "consider it payback."

"For what?"

"For hitting me when we met. And for pouncing on me the LAST time we met."

He sat in confusion, not knowing what to say.

"Gyah.. Anyhow, the Dib hyu-man is here because his evil sister-" I realized the absence of the Dib, looking for him, now just noticing the pile of sparking parental units. "Zephyr!" I accused.

"What?!"

"No wonder they did not answer the door!" I entered the kitchen, noting to fix the two robots.. and to build a tracking device for Gir's remaining pieces.

"What are you doing?" I asked, the Dib spinning back around.

"Nothing! Why?"

"You looked quite occupied."

"What makes you say that?"

"I do! What a silly question. I spoke, no?"

"Well, yeah, but I wasn't doing anything!"

"Rather defensive about doing nothing, are you not?"

"HMPH."

I smirked as he left my line of sight, following him. "Are you quite satisfied? You know where I am now. No need to worry."

Zephyr glowered at the hyu-man, looking him over.

Dib shot a look over his shoulder with almost the exact same expression. "I can't help but worry with you hanging around with THAT."

The vampire hissed, covering himself with his cloak.

"I told you that I am safe with him. Do not be jealous," I playfully added, guiding him back towards the door.

"Good! Kick him out like you SHOULD have done when he got here!"

I rolled my eyes, opening the door to be greeted with a flash and deafening crackle.

I reeled back from the drenched demon on my doorstep, still stunned from the bright light. "Gyah! What was that?! And what is that liquid all over-!?"

A droplet met the carpet, it's body separating in a splash with a noise as soft as a pin drop, yet as loud as a bomb fire.

Oh..

I recoiled as he entered, carrying the death liquid with him. "Drayne.." I noticed the pouring rain beyond the doorway and through the speckled glass of the windows. "How dare you enter here! Get out of my base!"

"Why is HE allowed in here, and I'm not?" he protested, keeping a finger in Dib's direction.

"He was just leaving," Zephyr defended as I moved near him for comfort.

Another flash? And boom.. How frightening! I remember this..!

"But he was in here."

"That does not matter! I want you out! COMPUTER!" I shrieked as Drayne came forward still, causing me to hide behind Zephyr's cloak.

Dib shoved the other out of the way before he was grabbed by a robotic hand, being captured instead.

The door shut itself before the rain could squeeze in with the help of the wind's sick humor.

The vampire blinked as the demon approached him, shielding me.

"Cute, but I need to talk to you, alien."

As he yanked the cloak away, I scrambled up to the higher back of the couch. "I do not have repellent! I DO NOT HAVE REPELLENT! COMPUTER!"

The arms and wires that were previously ready to capture Drayne disappeared back into the ceiling. A dome slammed itself over him, cutting him off from the outer world.

The demon glared at the container, tapping at the glass, then banging on it.

A blast of air forced its way in through the top, his clothes and hair flopping and rippling.

Once the dome was lifted, he growled.

I blinked, observing him, then smiled proudly from his dry state. "Alright, NOW we may-"

He grabbed my arm, pulling me along to the kitchen.

"Hey," Dib attempted.

The vampire looked up to the captured child, letting out a giggle of amusement.

"Can you get me down from here?"

"Mn.. No."

"What?! Why not?!"

Zephyr smiled, shrugging. "I don't like you. And I don't know how. It's not MY house.."

"You live here!" he protested.

"Rule number one, NO WATER IN MY BASE!" I screeched in his face, just to make sure he understood loud and clear. "Rule number TWO, NO DEMONS ALLOWED IN MY BASE! And RULE NUMBER THREE, YOU ARE NOT TO STEP IN MY KITCHEN!"

I paused to straighten my uniform and take a breath, clearing my throat. "Now, what did you wish to speak about?" I asked, hopping up to the table to sit.

Drayne leaned beside me. "Well, I'm breaking the rules this time because we're talking."

"Yes, I have already established that. Go on?"

He lowered his voice, his eyes not straying from mine as all seriousness took over his being.

"How did you know about Aphrodite?"

"Who?"

"My sister! How did you know about her? Who told you?!"

"Relax, demon. No one told me. Do not be so para-"

"Zim, I'm being VERY serious about this. The only POSSIBLE way for you to have known about her is if someone knew her from then, and you JUST got here. The only person to have lived since then would have to be a supernatural being. It's been nearly three centuries. Maybe more? It's been a while, I can't keep track."

So, I assume you would be blaming the vampire, then?"

"Exactly. That is why I asked if anyone told you. And more specifically, did HE?"

"He?"

"The vampire!"

"Oh! Zephyr? No, he did not tell me.. I just knew."

"Like.. being psychic?"

"Did we not already go over this?"

"Just answer me!"

"NO, NOT like being psychic! I cannot explain this if you already reject the pen in my hand!"

He shook his head, disbelieving?

"Okay… Okay, well, let's 'pretend' that there actually IS a pen in your hand."

I nodded once. "Not pretending, but alright."

"Yeah.. So, what are you doing with that pen?"

"Writing what I say, obviously."

"Right now?"

"No, I just wrote your response then. Now I am writing mine again."

"Huh.. So, you're writing.."

"Yes."

"Is there any way to prove that?"

Hmn.. I never thought about that.. "Ehm.. How so?"

"You tell ME, author."

"Err.." I tapped my lip, searching the kitchen for an answer. "But.. what ever I do, you would probably think it is alien technology."

"Well, how about the weather? You hate water.. so get rid of it."

"Weather?"

"Outside. Rain, sunny, snowing, windy? Weather."

"Ah.. Well.. Whatever that means, ehm.." The rain is.. gone?

"Alright?"

I nodded, giving his cue to step out.

I peeked at him through the doorway.

"Drayne, can you get me down from here?"

"Hold on," the demon brushed him off, crossing his arms.

"Computer, let him go," I mumbled, leaning my chin in my palm.

Dib hit the ground with an ungraceful thump. He huffed, brushing himself off with a glare at the ceiling.

Zephyr looked up quickly over the top of his book, then shrugged.

"Alright, you're just lucky. It stopped raining," Drayne announced as he popped in again.

I shrugged. "Well, I showed you."

"Showed him what?" Dib peeked from behind Drayne.

"ZIM, DO YOU NEED HELP IN THERE?"

I stuck my tongue out. "No, vampire! Just read you little book of water and ships! I showed him my WINDOW, Dib hyu-man," I replied.

"What..? Why?"

"Can you prove it some other way?" Drayne asked, ignoring the child behind him as he sat.

"Prove what?" Dib persisted, inching towards the table.

Drayne sighed, but I giggled evilly.

A.. a RODENT! appeared in Dib's pocket.

"AHH! WHAT IS THAT?!" Dib whacked immediately at his pocket from the squeaking and rustling, trying to get the creature out.

I cackled at the entertainment, tossing over to meet a rippling cushion as snacks popped here and there, filling the kitchen.

"This is rather fun trying to prove things!" I exclaimed to the buried creatures, folding my arms behind my head against what was once a table, now a relaxing, soft surface.

A hand reached out from the pile, Dib's head following with a glare. "What's going on?!"

"You!" I pointed. "You are what is going on.. the ceiling!"

Dib found himself upside down, confusion painting his brow. "..Huh?"

I leered as Drayne appeared above the surface in horror. "What?" I asked sweetly, watching as the Dib tried to find a way down as he yelled in fright.

Drayne appeared above me, a deep scowl planted in his lips. "Get. Him. DOWN."

I narrowed an eye at him dangerously, rolling quickly out from under him before the Dib hyu-man could fall and hit the hard surface of the table.

Drayne helped him up with a small apology.

"I don't need a 'sorry'! I need to know what just happened! And all this food wasn't here a minute ago!"

The demon then shot his head towards me again as I climbed down.

"What?!" I demanded from his gawking. "I already know that I am amazing. You do not have to say it, although it would not hurt."

"You're NOT amazing! This alien house thing obviously can do all of what you THOUGHT you just did!"

I scoffed. "Well, maybe my base CAN do such things, but I did that myself!"

"You're lying."

Rewind, anyone?"

"You're lying."

"Didn't you just say that?" Dib mumbled, then glared. "Now can you JUST tell me what's going on?"

"I thought that I already told you, hyu-man.. Therefore, I will not explain myself again. Blame your misfortunes.. on the abnormally large size of your head."

"Why does everyone say that?!"

"Say what, ehm?"

"That my head is big!"

I squinted at the size of it, comparing it to Drayne's. "..Because it is?"

"It isn't!"

Drayne then grabbed Dib by the back of the trench coat, pulling him out of the kitchen.

"Yeah, you run away! Fearful mortals!" the vampire mocked.

The demon ignored him and slammed the door after the two, much to the Dib's protest.

I followed to the window, pressing my gloved hands and face to the glass to watch them leave. "Why did they go?" I asked.

"Because you scared them off. That's good! Not as good as me, though. You're not exactly the scary type. If anything, you're more cutesy than scary." He covered his mouth with the book as soon as he realized he had spoken over the limit, staring.

I stared back, lowering my antennae. "What is THAT supposed to mean?"

"Nothing," he mumbled lowering his head back behind the old cover.

Hmn.. Is such a compliment worth it to be angry over? I WAS called cute.. Then again, I do not remember Irkens wanting to be cute.. or BEING cute, for that matter.

"Very well, vampire. I may not LOOK scary, but I do not need to look a certain way to be a death machine.

"I still don't believe that."

"HMPH. You will see… But I have work to do, so YOU simply guard the upper base. Understand?"

"Mhm," he responded, his face still hidden.

I watched him carefully, his form not moving the slightest inch.

"..And can you NOT destroy my creations?" I commanded more than asked as I hauled my broken parental robots over my shoulders.

"I won't," he assured, finally peeking around the pages to eye me.

I eyes him back as he moved his lips slightly.

"Are you really writing this?"

I grinned as I neared the kitchen doorway. "No, silly vampire.."

"..Oh.."

"I already wrote it!"

He sat there alone, looking back down, wondering if he should continue on reading after that frightening comment.

After a few more moments, he grinned evilly, leaning near the pages. "Yesssss, Seth, KILL HIM!"

I looked back to the shout.

..Who is this Seth?


	10. X equals SKOOL plus FANGS

_Defective_

CHAPTER 10

Although the sky was absent of color, and the farthest of stars twinkled to their bitter ends, Drayne was sneaking around in the professor's lab….

He quietly stepped around on the metallic tile, carefully keeping his ears out for the front door, and for certain residents..

There is NO possible WAY that the alien could have changed the weather like that.. The only logical explanation would be that the planet was already taken over, encased in a disguised cover, in which the alien could change the Earth's weather with his ALIEN technology. And with the planet within his palms, he came down without a fear of something going wrong..

Then again, it was just an educated guess.

But if he WAS right, then he would be able to see the imitation atmosphere through Membrane's telescope.

Or maybe Dib has it.. He says he always uses it anyways.

After one more glance around the room that contained no telescope, he zipped up the stairs, avoiding that one step that always creaked towards the top of the staircase.

He peeked on the hyu-man's sister, leaving the door before her security could register an intruder.

Drayne then tiptoed to his friend's door, looking in to spot a glare from the computer screen.

He shut the door behind him with a click, finding Dib asleep in his chair at the desk with headphones secured around his ears.

Drayne approached the child, finding the screen to be of a kitchen.. with a partially-built robot. The vampire sat to the far right, still engrossed in his book.

"Hmn," the demon scowled at the creature. He has to plan to have a 'talk' with Zephyr. SURELY he would know which vampire had the nerve to mess with a demon!

* * *

Zephyr lifted his eyes as I marched in with the male parental unit.

I snapped the goggles back over my eyes, returning to the robot in need, connecting the head back in place. "The NEXT time I find you destroying my technology, I'LL EAT YOUR HEAD!"

The vampire placed his book down, his head tilting to the right. "Well, that was not my fault! They continued to bother me, even though they CLEARLY saw me reading."

"Son, you shouldn't treat your mother like that!"

I blinked up to the robot in confusion. "I am doing nothing wrong.." I then pointed to Zephyr with the sharp-edged tool in my hand. "I MEAN it, Zephyr. I will NOT tolerate your slarky, little antics. You may have gotten the better of me one too many times BEFORE, but you will not do so THIS time!"

"It's not polite to yell, son."

I growled at the robot, grinding my teeth.

* * *

Dib gasped as he shot up from his mattress, looking around his deep blue-hued room.

His eyes landed on the non-active computer, shifting his view to the window that was letting in the indigo light.

"Hmn.." his voice awoke, but was only short-lived once he looked at the blaring green numbers on his digital clock, registering what time it was and unwillingly dropping back to his bed, turning to the wall.

He stayed as such for what seemed like forever before he shut his eyes…

"Good morning!"

Dib yelped from the rude awakening, hiding back under the covers. "How do you people get up SO early?!"

"We go to SLEEP early. Now come on! You have skool in a half hour!" Drayne ripped the covers off of him.

Dib groaned from the invading light, covering his eyes.

He was definitely NOT a morning person.

* * *

"I don't WANT to go to skool!" Zephyr whined repeatedly, his cloak dragging behind him.

I continued on despite this, my hands clenched into fists with determination. "I do not care how your skool experience was in the past! We are in the PRESENT, where those children who bothered you are DEAD!" I lowered my voice, taking a breath. "Now enough whining and toughen up."

The vampire hung his head, letting out a sigh.

I stepped up to the front doors, waiting for the parental units to open them for me.

Zephyr followed with another groan of his, though staying close.

I looked around the crowded hallways, seeking out an adult.

Once I fought my way through to the back of one, I tapped them. "Excuse me!" I snapped, rather rudely, actually.

The hyu-man turned, her? tusks painfully noticeable.

"HEY! YOU'RE THAT KID WHO TRIED TO DITCH SKOOL!"

I scrambled back from the outburst, bumping into the passing children.

Zephyr held on, not daring to let go in the powerful swarm.

"GET BACK HERE! GET THAT KID!"

I squeaked, running down the hall with the vampire, shoving hyu-mans out of my way.

"Let's just go home!" he whined over the commotion I had caused.

I scowled, growling through my clenched teeth as I stormed past the confused children.

I slammed the first door open to my right, peeking in.

"That's a classroom, not the principal's office!"

"Well, excuse ME!" I allowed the door to shut before moving on.

"That one, up ahead!"

"How do you even know? I thought you never went here before."

"There's a huge sign above the door.."

I looked up as we approached the large doors, looking back to my parental units who had managed to keep up. "Hem.. Do the doors have security of any sorts?"

"Security?"

"Yes."

"What do you mean?"

"Security! Protection?"

"Oh.. no.. Zim, this is a skool, not a military-"

I flinched back from the doorknob as it twisted, inching the door open.

I peeked inside the dark room, motioning for the vampire and robots to follow.

"But.. Zim, I'm afraid of the-"

"Get over it!" I found a light switch for Zephyr's sake, widening my eyes to the group of hooded.. hyu-mans? in the very dim light. It was hard to tell..

The creature at the far end of the table pet what looked like a rodent, who was petting an even smaller rodent of its own.

"I don't like it here."

"Sh!" I waved back to silence him.

"What are you children doing in here? And parents?"

"I have brought my PARENTS here with me so I may be enrolled in this shelter of knowledge and filthy children."

"Hmn.." the creature stood, putting the rodent thing down.

It scrambled away after its own pet had gotten away, chasing it under the table.

"You sound so suspicious," Zephyr whispered harshly.

The tall thing observed us, its eyes landing on the vampire. "Who are you?"

"I'M NOT DEAD!" he screamed, hiding behind me.

"Interesting.. Is he related to you?"

"Related?" I repeated.

"Yes, we are!"

"NO, we are NOT!" I hissed. "We are BOTH here to be enrolled, but his parents are both dead, so MY parents decided to adopt him. So NO, we are not related. Just.. in the same household."

"Then you will be enrolled.. But have you committed any crimes?"

Zephyr and I exchanged glances. "Um.. I.. killed squirrels.."

"And I have accidentally blown innocent planets to oblivion?" I smiled with clasped hands in front.

"…Good enough for me. I will take you to your classroom." The hooded creature flinched as he stepped into the bright light of the hall.

After his spell of torture, he looked down to us. "Last name?"

The vampire scratched at his temple before snapping with a smile. "de Vide."

"Hem?"

"First?"

"Zephyr."

"Zeh-fer?"

"No.. Zuh-fear. I know, it sounds weird."

"Do not insult my taste in names! I simply did not KNOW that the name was pronounced differently!" I lectured.

"Huh?" Zephyr tipped his head. "Oh.. Right.. Then if YOU'RE controlling things, make this guy less creepy!"

"Heh, I am not the one who came up with his little costume.. I do not even know where we are going!"

"Last name?" the creature interrupted.

"Ehm?"

"Your LAST NAME, child?"

"I do not know of such nonsense! Why have a LAST name? I am only Zim! Lest you need a title. In that case.. well, nevermind, I am still not sure of that either."

"What is your child's last name?" he? questioned the robots.

There was an awkward silence before I nudged the mother.

"I made muffins!" it cried out.

I grinned nervously, hoping such an answer would satisfy him.. and me.

"Hmn.." the creature hummed, nodding his head. "Alright, here's your stop. Now Zim, if your parents could come with me.."

"NO!" I burst, covering my lips. "Err.. I mean.. My.. parents have to go.. to.. their places of work! Yes.. so, they cannot stay." I glared up at the robots. "Leave."

As the three tall things left, Zephyr held me back from the doorknob.

"Zim, please! Let's just get out of here, okay?"

"I thought we went THROUGH this already, vampire!"

The door whipped open to reveal a rather towering, scrawny woman in black.

We blinked up at her, at a loss for words.

"You CHILDREN are interrupting my LECTURE."

I tilted my head before she yelled again.

"Do I need to bring you two to the principal's office?!"

"We just CAME from the principal's office," I fought, holding my head high.

"Then why are you HERE?" her tongue slithered about.

"We were brought here to be in your class." I poked her looming face.

I then walked past the growling teacher, urging Zephyr to follow.

The vampire stayed as far away from the teacher as possible.

I waited for the teacher to walk in, but when I looked back, she was missing.

I slammed the door, then grinned as I turned back around to face the children. "Oh, hello," I waved.

The Dib hyu-man only stared from his seat near the stained windows.

Drayne carefully watched, leaning back and crossing his arms.

Zephyr awkwardly hid behind me from all of the staring, silent children.

"Well?" I asked aloud, narrowing my eyes. "Who DARES to explain the purpose of being here?"

"It's to LEARN, genius," Drayne muttered, but just loud enough for others to laugh.

"Drayne, don't say that," Dib whispered, a bit out of fear, the other percentage.. unknown?

"Yes, so I AM a genius," I agreed with the sarcastic demon, smirking. "But to learn what?"

Dib carefully monitored his friend's behavior, the fear evident in his eyes of what could happen after that shocking experience in an alien's kitchen.

..He can still recall the pressure in his head from being on the ceiling, and he shuddered.

"Everything," another child answered.

I looked at him, the child absent with a hole in the ceiling, debris crumpling back down to the desk.

Dib gasped, glaring. "Zim! You can't just go around doing this!"

"Oh, yes I can!" I proudly admitted, to which Zephyr partially smiled behind his cloak's collar.

Just as I was about to tease him again, the door opened to give way for the angry, hissing teacher.

After observing the gaping hole in the ceiling, she growled. "SIT DOWN."

Zephyr sat on the floor immediately.

I mirrored him hurriedly, only earning another hiss.

"In a DESK."

"Make me!" I spat, holding a glaring contest with her.

After a few moments though, I let up. "How does one sit IN a desk?"

"Sit in a CHAIR, which is accompanying a desk."

I stood, allowing Zephyr to pass by and claim his spot in the room.

Once he sat, I turned back to the front, taking my place in the chair behind the large desk.

The teacher seemed not to mind, because she then ignored me and returned to a lecture.

I observed the creature that made the children shudder, crossing my arms in thought.

Interesting..

I flicked my eyes up to Zephyr, who looked rather distressed from being back in such an environment.. until he caught my gaze, then made a cross between a glare and a pleading look.

I only smiled in amusement, licking my lips with my eyes landing back on the Dib hyu-man, who has been raising his hand.

I did the same in confusion.

Drayne scowled and motioned for me to stop, but the teacher then responded with an annoyed huff.

"WHAT, Dib?"

"Zim's not supposed to be sitting at that desk. It's only for-"

"If it keeps him quiet and out of my way, then he can stay there."

"And so begins my reign of terror in this classroom," I mouthed as I observed the others, crossing my ankles up on the desk, grinning back again at the Dib in all of my smugness.

* * *

"I don't like the teacher," Zephyr stated matter-of-factly, taking a step forward with the others, a metal tray in hand.

I smiled, shrugging as I searched, finding the Dib hyu-man across the room where the tables were mostly deserted, along with the demon, who looked as if he was trying to convince his friend to move.

The Dib and I met each other's gaze just as he bit his lip.

I immediately left the vampire who asked where I was going, but I ignored him and finally approached the Dib hyu-man, grinning devilishly. "Hello again! Not hungry?" I gestured to his untouched meal.

"Well, it's kind of hard to be with YOUR running around my skool, let alone my PLANET, space boy!"

"Excuse me? YOUR planet? No one can ever own such a thing," I scoffed. "And who said I was male?"

"You already told me that when we met," he reminded.

"Oh, yes! ..But I could have been lying."

"What, you're a girl?" Drayne asked, seemingly fascinated.

I glared in rage. "Is it my voice?! Do I SOUND female? I know that I am quite adorable with my vocals and all, but I must admit that my robot sounds a TON cuter, being MALE that he is!"

They stared, and quite a few others that passed by.

"I was only asking you a simple question," the demon mumbled. "But don't tell me you've never been called a girl before! Look at what you're wearing!"

"I already told him that," Dib interrupted.

I looked down once again to my uniform in question, waiting for it to give me an answer.

"See? It's girly," Drayne nodded.

"I still do not understand," I responded, looking to the Dib for assurance, then scowling slightly at the demon as I pinched the striped fabric.

Zephyr cautiously took a seat beside me, causing the demon to tense.

The three of us looked up to him, to which he frowned back in all nervousness.

"What?" he quietly asked, his voice retreating back in his constricted throat.

"I said that ZIM looks like a girl. Don't you agree?" Drayne smiled.

"Why is this being debated over? I was only teasing you!" I growled.

The Dib seemed to be reluctant to participate in such conversation, which I did not protest to at all.

"Well, he.." The vampire looked me over, widening his eye. "Sort of," he mumbled passively, looking away again.

"See? What did I tell-"

"That's enough!" Dib scolded the demon, shoving his food away. "I don't want to hear any more of it! ZIM, go sit at your own table, and take THAT with you," he pointed to the vampire, "I just want some peace right now."

I considered staying just to bother him, but then I stood, nodding my head.

"Wow, how did you do that?" Drayne asked once they were alone.

"Do what?" Dib grumble, looking down.

"Get him to go away like that!"

He shrugged. "I just told him to, I don't know."

"But don't you see? Maybe that means he doesn't ACTUALLY control everything! Why would he make you yell at him?"

"Well, duh! No one can really do all of that!"

"What, now you're against it? I thought you accused him back in the classroom about that kid! You know, he went through the ceiling out of nowhere?"

"Yeah, but when does that NOT happen to kids in skool?"

"The same exact kid who spoke out just so happened to disappear? Coincidence? I think not. I don't know what to think anymore.."

"I would blame it on coincidence."

"Fine… His base did all of those crazy things, then?"

Dib groaned, dropping his head down.

I pursed my lips at the squishy, grey.. glob that was slowly creeping its way off of the vampire's tray. "What IS that?"

"Apparently food."

"Food?" I cackled. "Not much different from a slorbreast's offspring, if I am not mistaken."

Zephyr only stared, trying to crack a smile, but was obviously lost.

I narrowed an eye back, crossing my arms and leaning over the table towards him, though glancing to my left. "Forget it," I mumbled, looking around in curiosity. "So.. you have been in skool a while ago, yes?"

"Yeah," he turned his attention back to his somewhat meal. "What about it?"

"What do you learn? Or did?"

"That I should stop trying to learn?"

"Eh?"

"Zim, I haven't gone to skool in years. Could have been centuries. The last time I was in school, I was learning about…"

He froze, his mouth still open from the loss of words.

"What?" I asked, resting my fist under my chin.

"I can't remember.. it was so long ago.. But I CAN remember all of the theories that scientists kept coming up with, competing against each other for the fame and fortune. Everything I learned was contradicted by something new. There's really no point in it anymore. At least, for-"

"GYAH!" I interrupted from the shock, spinning around in my seat and scrambling away from the invading hand of my Pak.

Ready to slap the child again, I hissed.

"Hello," he grinned, his mouth's corners stretching up to impossibly scary lengths.

I caught Zephyr physically cringing as I turned to him for help. Apparently he needed mine.

I inhaled, realizing that I would, once again, be the brave one and glared. "What do you want, hyu-man?! Be gone with you!"

"You have green skin. That's rather odd.. Where are you from?"

"Ehm.." I looked from Zephyr to the ceiling, to the Dib across the lunchroom, then finally to the demon who was watching.

"Canada," Zephyr blurted for me once silence became too painful for him to bear.

"Canada?" the child repeated. "I didn't know Canada produced green kids."

Breaking eye contact with the demon, I focused back on the hyu-man. "I have a rare skin disease!" sprang my defense as I scowled, standing to be looming over him.

"Don't stand on the seat!" the vampire hissed. "You'll attract attention!"

The child looked up, jumping to meet my level and beyond.

I seethed at his height, holding my head tall.

He did the same with that grin of his.

"Zim!" Zephyr strained.

I ignored him, my pride screaming in agony from this taller being.

After one of the most intense staring contests I had ever participated in, he hopped back down to take a seat.

"So! If HE'S from Canada, where are YOU from?"

"Cape May," Zephyr quickly mumbled.

"Oh? What's it like there?"

"It's.. busy.. and creepy."

While they conversed so casually, I slowly sat back down, still on edge from the height difference, be it that it was merely a few inches.

He will not win…

"Not to be rude, but.. why did you come over here and talk to us?" Zephyr asked.

"You two looked weird." He grinned again, turning his gaze to me. "I LIKE weird."

I looked down to a shine of a device over his grey sleeve. "Err.. Well, we ARE normal, so.. run along."

"Hm.. of course.. I'll catch you later."

Once he stalked off, I quickly turned back to Zephyr. "Catch us later? We are going to be captured?"

"It's a phrase for goodbye, and to see us later, not catch us."

"Ah.. But.. did you even know him? You two seemed quite friendly.."

"No.. But he kind of reminds me of Dib with that outfit of his. Only different colors, of course. At least Dib worked some blue into his. THAT child's clothing just looked… bluh."

"…Why are you discussing color with me?" I asked quietly, then glared. "It does not matter what he was wearing! He is scary!"

"And I'm not?"

"No, YOU are just Zephyr. I meant intelligence-wise."

"So now you're calling me stupid?"

"NO! This is not about you at all! Why must you be so difficult?!"

"Because.. I feel as if I am supposed to be?"

"WELL, do not be! And NEVERMIND. I am not ranting to you!" I huffed, dropping my head onto the table.

* * *

"Zephyr."

Zephyr, after finishing the sentence and turning the page slowly, looked up to the figure that casted a shadow over him.

"Drayne," he responded, cautiously placing his bookmark between the yellowing pages and shutting it.

"Whatchya reading?"

"Why?"

He shrugged. "It's just an icebreaker."

"A.. mint?" he questioned, widening an eye.

"No… No, to start a conversation.. Ocean Lover?"

"Huh?"

"The.. Book.." he said slowly, eyebrows knitting. "You're not very good at talking, are you?"

The vampire narrowed the dark voids of his eyes, his indigo pupils shining through. "It's about a mermaid."

"Oh?"

"In love with a pirate."

"Mhm." Drayne took a seat on the bench, beneath the vampire who shifted uncomfortably on the table.

"But falls in love with a vampire."

"What about the pirate?"

"He was a typical pirate, and- Why do you care?" he cut himself off.

"I don't, really. Just trying to get you to talk to me without you running away again."

"Well, you looked like you were going to kill me the first time I saw you!"

"What are you even worried about? I couldn't kill a vampire. It's a myth to kill one with a stake."

"I didn't mean like that."

Drayne pursed his lips, his eyebrows lifting in feigned surprise. "What do you mean, then?"

"You KNOW what I mean!"

"No, seriously, tell me." He smirked as the vampire squirmed in frustration.

"You know that only a demon can kill a vampire."

"And vice versa."

"We already know what you are."

"We? As in you and Zim? How did HE find out? Did you tell him?! And where is he, anyway?"

Zephyr watched the demon glance around and even under the table. "I do not know. No. And hiding."

"Hiding? Why?"

"This child scared him," he waved it off. "But why do you think that I told him?"

"Because.. Well.." Drayne leaned back, breathing in as he leaned on his fist. "I thought that vampires have a strong sixth sense."

Zephyr gently kicked his legs that hung off the edge of the table, his tongue feeling around his fangs. "No.. Well, I don't know. I've never met one."

"You haven't said hello to your reflection? Or can you really not see yourself? Is that why your makeup in all messed up?"

"What?" Zephyr's fingers immediately covered his cheeks, finding smudged eyeliner as he lowered them again. "No, I was just reading a depressing part in the book!" He wiped at the ruined makeup. "And that's a myth! Of COURSE I can see myself in the mirror! That's stupid.."

"I never really believed it myself. It seemed too farfetched.. So.. did the alien ever tell you how he knew about me, then?"

"No.. That never really came up. AGAIN, why do you care?"

"Because he's done and said some things that make me believe that he.. well, it sounds stupid, never mind.."

"That he what? Controls everything? Is writing all of this? Yeah, he is. Really."

"You seriously believe that? You don't even need proof?!"

"He ALREADY proved it."

"Oh, yeah? HOW?"

"He told me what it felt like. He said that it feels empowering, yet gets lonely when he remembers that it's only a story."

"..He could be making that up."

"Why would he? What would that accomplish, exactly?"

Drayne shrugged. "Maybe he's not right in the head?"

"He's perfectly logical. Just a little distant, that's all."

"Alright, well, let's just say that he IS in control of all of this, and us. Why are you not freaking out?"

"Why would I?" he asked, carefully placing his book aside.

"Um, because we could all be in SERIOUS DANGER?"

"OH, please! Not WE. All of YOU could be in serious danger. Not me."

"And why not you?"

"Zim said it would not feel right if I was really gone. And Dib. But not you," he grinned.

Drayne squinted at the vampire. "He's got you brainwashed! No one can control everything like that!"

"HE can."

Fed up, the demon huffed in disbelief, turning and storming off.

Zephyr smiled at his accomplishment to drive Drayne away, picking his book back up and continuing to read.

"Who was that?"

He practically slammed the book shut with impatience, turning his head back to the familiar child with short, black hair. "No one."

"Do you know him?"

"Obviously, yes. What do you want?"

"Do you know where that alien is?"

"I don't know, he's hiding! Why is everyone bothering me today?! Do I have a target on my face?"

"So, he IS an alien, then?"

"What..? No!"

"But you didn't deny it."

Zephyr bit his tongue with a hiss, practically smacking himself. "I didn't HEAR you before! Can you just leave me alone? I JUST want to read."

As the vampire opened the book again, the child grabbed it, to which Zephyr blinked in surprise, soon glaring.

"Give. That. BACK," he growled darkly.

"If you help me find him."

I watched the hyu-man keep the book away, scowling at the vampire's efforts to retrieve it.

Crawling out from the shrubbery, I kept as much to myself as possible to not attract attention, however, a ball smacked me in the temple, sending me tumbling!

There was darkness for only a split moment before I was being pulled back up by possibly the universe's most talkative alien.. with orange, puffy hair.

"I am SO sorry, I didn't mean to knock you down! I'm just really bad at throwing, and you walked by! Oh, I'm so sorry!"

I shook the uneasiness away, glaring to the child that could not be quiet. "It is fine! I have been through MUCH worse!" Disgusted from his hands fixing my uniform and dusting me off, I shoved him.

"Sorry! Really, I am! Can you forgive me?"

"…Yes, whatever," I grumbled, creating distance between us with steps of departure.

He followed, however!

I widened an eye at the child stalking me, growling. "What do you WANT?"

"To be your friend? I feel so bad that I just did that! Oh, can we be friends? Pretty please?"

"Well, NO, because I do not have time to-"

"Great! I'm Keef!" He stuck his hand out with a large smile. "What's YOUR name?"

I stared at the three-fingered hand being presented to me, my eyes narrowing. "Are you some sort of spy?"

He frowned, lowering his hand. "Huh?"

"What is your species?" I pressed.

"Hyu-man..?"

"Then why is your hand.. Gyah, forget it! Leave me to my sneaki-"

"Hello!"

I screamed from that child behind me, clawing the air to keep him away. "WHAT?! WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!"

"To come with me?"

I narrowed my eyes, looking down to the book. "I will if you give me that." Where was Zephyr?

"I'll give it to you if you follow me."

"Well, I most certainly will not follow if you do not give me that book FIRST."

He took a step away as soon as I tried to grab it.

"Did you need help?" Keef asked, unsure whether to laugh or take the situation seriously.

"No!" I snapped. "Just leave me!"

"Oh.. Okay.. Well, I'll see you later, buddy?"

I darted after the retreating child who held the book hostage, but looked absolutely terrified!

I cackled as we ran right through the skool doors and hallways, dodging angry teachers and left-open lockers.

He suddenly stopped though, and I only realized it was too late when a locker-


End file.
